Five Best Lines: 'Wilfred' - 08/08/2013

In this week's episode of "Wilfred," entitled "Confrontation," Wilfred crashes Christmas and pits Ryan against his family.

Here are the five best lines from the episode:


"It is not an insane asylum. It has ducks."

--Ryan, arguing with his sister about the location where their mother is being housed


"A big wheel, so I can drag Santa's severed head through the streets of Venice."

--Wilfred's explanation to Ryan of what he wants for Christmas


"Maybe it's time your Dad found out how much he screwed you up. You've always said how he's a manipulative bully. Now's the time to stand up to him. Perhaps in the form of a 'Beat It' style knife fight."

--Wilfred's not-so-helpful advice to Ryan


"Hello poopy pants! I know you're all grown up, but I will always think of you that way."

--The less than kid greeting Kristen receives from her mother


"If you don't come out of there right now, there's no more Wasabi Funyams in the rec room."

--The caretaker for Ryan's mom, trying to persuade her to leave the bathroom