When it comes to a show such as "Keeping Up With The Kardashians," most people fall into one of two distinct camps. Either you loathe the Kardashians, and would rather be repeatedly poked in the eye than watch their reality TV series. Or you're wildly captivated by their antics.

If you fall into the latter camp, you'll love the new season of "Keeping Up With The Kardashians," which promises to give viewers plenty of the self-absorbed and oblivious to all consequences behavior fans have come to expect from the family.

The truth is that while I suspect the Kardashians think people watch the show because they find the family entertaining and sexy, most people watch because following the dynamics of the Kardashian family is a lot like diagramming the details of a painful and messy train wreck. No matter what the circumstances, every crisis in anyone's life quickly revolves around the question of "how will it affect me?" It makes for a surreal and often bizarre family life, which is perfectly captured in the season premiere of the show.

In theory, the episode is about Khloe Kardashian's brief jail stint. In fact, she ends up heading to jail because she missed two mandatory D.U.I. classes (mandated by a judge after her 2007 arrest). She seems shocked that the judge wouldn't just let her extend the process to fit her schedule. And so it all begins.

It takes mom Kris Kardashian about five minutes to go from "my daughter's going to jail" to "her going to jail is painful for me." That discussion evolves into a recounting of her pain over the death of her former husband Robert Kardashian, who passed away five years ago. While I don't doubt her sincerity over her pain, the timing of the incident just screams "Hey! Look at me!"

As it turns out, an over-crowded jail means that daughter Khloe only spends three hours in jail, and that doesn't seem to be enough time for her to be "scared straight." It does, however, provide enough time for everyone else in the family to bemoan how scared they were about Khloe's incarceration, and how bad it made them feel.

The person I feel sorry for in this family dynamic is Bruce Jenner, who is married to Kris Kardashian. He drifts in and out of the Kardashian household like a ghost, and you get the feeling that he has no idea of how to deal with the antics of his wife and their daughters. And I can't say I blame him. It's difficult to figure out who's the mom and who are the kids in this household, and while it's fun watching the chaos from afar, I can't imagine how difficult it is to live with everyday.

When all is said and done, season three of "Keeping Up The Kardashians" is just what you would expect. And if you're a fan of the show, that's a very good thing.

Season three of "Keeping Up With The Kardashians" premieres on E! on Sunday, March 8th, 2009 at 10:00 pm ET/PT.