As she walks through the office, Leo surprises her by pulling her down and making her sit on his lap. She laughs, cuddles and smiles. A co-worker named Marcy looks over the cubicle wall and seems to approve, "Big improvement!", Marcy says, then sinks out of sight after Leo and Izzy give her a chagrined look.

Leo makes some warm suggestions about them going off to his place, right then. Izzy asks, "Now?" and we can see that Leo is, er, interested. Izzy kisses him just as her dad walks by. He harrumphs discreetly as he walks by, and they break it off a little.

At Leo's place now, on his bathroom floor. Looks like Leo got his wish, after all. Maybe Izzy attacked him like she did in the kitchen during The Unveiling! Isabel tries to reassure Leo about her dad. Right at that moment, Barry (Leo's dad) walks in the front door, and Izzy scrambles out of the way, hiding just inside the entrance to the bathroom. Leo looks flustered as he greets his father. Izzy sticks out one lovely calf and with her big toe slides her undies towards herself and away from Barry's sight.

Barry announces that he's been offered a big job in Dayton, Ohio. Manager of marketing for US Tires, radial division. If Leo will remember Barry's friend Maury, the big guy, that's the person who offered Barry the job at 60K /year. Leo wants to know if Barry will take Jake and Grandpa with him, and Barry says, "Yes. I have two weeks to decide", but it's always been a hurry up, deadline kind of situation. Leo asks, "What does Jake think of all of this?" and Barry looks uncomfortable and says that he hasn't told Jake yet. Leo becomes a little tense, and points out that Jake really should have a say in all of this.

Next, we are David's (Izzy's dad) office. He is having a very important phone call when Izzy walks in, a little intimidated. After the call, Izzy looks a little flustered as she asks that he please not call her "sweetheart" during the staff meetings. He walks behind her, distracted, saying "Yes, sweetheart, hang on, I'm listening to you". David is upset that the painter he contracted is not showing up. "I guess he got a better gig and is making me wait". Izzy sees an opportunity and says, "Um, Leo is a painter . . ." David is professionaly skeptical, asking if Leo is not just a day laborer. Izzy, more anxious to please, says "No, he's not, he's also artistic", and then David says that there is not much artistry to the painting job required. Izzy backpedals again. David takes one long look at her and asks, "You're not hurting for money, are you?", which exposes/offends Izzy even more and she walks out of the office. She's almost gone when David calls her back and asks that Leo give him a quote.

Next, we are with Jake and Barry, his and Leo's dad. Barry is telling Jake about Ohio and trying to manipulate Jake into liking it. "Jake, do you really like that school?" Jake is not playing along, he knows what Barry wants and gives it to him, in a displeased manner. "Yeah, yeah, ok". Barry says, "But Jake, I just wanted us to talk about it." Jake walks away, saying "Yeah, ok, we talked about it".

Back at Leo's, it's a nighttime scene. They are in bed, snuggling. Izzy tells him about the painting quote that David wants from Leo. Izzy says, "My dad has this idea, like you're this day laborer." Leo frankly tells her, "I am a day laborer". Izzy tries a couple of other tacks, and then makes a realization. She says, "Oh, I'm pushing it, like I always do. Don't, just don't take this job, please promise me!"

Next thing, of course, Leo is giving Mr. Lukens the quote. We are walking around his office, as Leo looks over the job. Both of them are extremely nervous but covering it. There is lots of tight breathing. David asks if he has his own crew, and Leo lies by saying yes. David asks that, please, if it's too much and Leo is over his head please tell him now and David won't think less of him. Leo says that he's up to it, and will make a quote, and Leo looks around, unsure. He fumbles at making the quote, mentions a couple of the things he'll have to get and comes up with a figure of $1700. David laughs, and Leo says, "$!500?". David says, "No, the other bid was for $3500. How about we make it for $2000 and we hope that you break even." Pats Leo on the shoulder and walks off.

At the paint store, Leo is talking to Rhonda his sister and frantically trying to choose between indistinguishable shades of off-white. Although, he is thinking of blue instead. Rhonda makes fun of him for all of this, and starts an astonishing round of truth-telling as Leo walks around looking for equipement. Rhonda says that Leo is operating from a feeling of inferiority, and that this is such a Roth trait. Grandpa wasn't successful, dad wasn't successful, and Leo will feel like such a traitor if he is succesful. Leo asks, "You're lumping me in with dad?", to which Rhonda responds "I'm just saying, that's so Rothian".

Outside, as they are carrying the paint to the beat-up station wagon Leo realizes, where is he going to get a crew?! Rhonda approaches a bunch of Hispanics hanging around at the street corner, which makes Leo nervous. Rhonda tries in very broken Spanish to ask the people if they will help "my son" with a paint job. She is really struggling with the Spanish. The kid who approached the closes takes one look at her and says in nearly-perfect English, "Yeah, my dad needs the work".

Leo brings his "crew" as Izzy reassures him that he'll do great, and kisses him. David comes by, and Leo nervously suggests a grayish blue instead of white, because "it has the clarity of white, but it doesn't have that antiseptic look". David looks discomfited, but says that he just needs the work done. Leo mentions that he needs the workers to move out, and they dither about who will ask them to. Finally, they agree on who (forgot, sorry!).

While working, Leo gets a call about how Jake was in a fight at school. His finger may be broken. Jake wants him to come, but Leo asks if their dad is not available. Jake wants Leo, and Leo finally agrees.  He asks Izzy to tell her dad what happened, and goes to the hospital.

Once there, Jake tells Leo how much he hates the Ohio idea. "It's a nightmare; grandpa, dad and me stuck out there forever , just, barbecuing." Leo asks if Jake has talked to dad about it, but Jake says that his dad won't give up the 60k, is set on the idea and besides, "you can't talk to dad"

Barry shows up at the hospital waiting room with grandpa Roth, where Leo greets them. Leo confronts Barry, "You can't do that to Jake, what will Jake do in Ohio?" Grandpa says that "You can't talk to Jake". Barry says that he's been waiting his whole life for this, and Leo admits "I know".

Back at the office, the English-speaking kid whom Rhonda first approached stops one of the writers walking by and says how much he admires his writing and his opinon about the Headless Barbies. David is upset that Leo is gone, but Izzy explains, smooths over the situation, and makes guarantees on Leo's behalf.

Outside, Leo is back and is unloading some paint from his car. Leo asks how his dad took it, and Izzy says "He's fine, he's fine". Izzy shows that she thinks Leo won't make the deadline by making all kinds of comforting statements about how Leo doesn't really have to meet the deadline. This touches a raw nerve with Leo, what with Rhonda lumping him together with their failed dad, and with great determination says "I will not walk away, I'm not going to be that person". Leo walks off, upset, and comes back to Izzy. "Thanks . . . it'll be ok". He walks into the building again, and Izzy is left behind looking sad and unsure.

Jake vistits Leo at Leo's place and immediately becomes diffident, saying he's bothering Leo. Leo is actually very glad to see him. Jake thanks Leo for coming to the hospital, and explains that this guy took his locker at school and Jake just lost it. Jake announces that he won't go to Ohio no matter what. He'll stay with the Chus. (Have we met the Chu family??). Leo reassures Jake that he has a place with him, and that dad would never go to Ohio without him.

Now we're at Rhonda's, where Leo is claiming that Barry'll never go to Ohio without Jake. They try to give each other responsibility for housing Jake, and then they stop and look at each other. It's a sad moment. Rhonda says "I can't believe we're having this conversation." Leo answers, "I know. Our own brother."

While Leo is at work painting, Hal (grandpa Roth) comes in with lunch and is very likable, supportive and encouraging of Leo. Hal announces that he won't go to Ohio. In addition, Hal reports that Jake has told Barry that Jake won't go to Ohio either. The situation is grim, and Leo should go visit them and straighten things out. David approaches, and Hal introduces himself. David talks to Leo, and is quite the pressure-inducing executive, telling Leo he knows he has this family situation but he's looking to Leo to do the job, "You have to, I'm relying on you." Leo courageously says I know, but I have to go. David is not pleased.

At Barry's, Leo reproaches Barry, "you're leaving Jake behind!" Barry thinks that Leo will change his mind and come with him. Then Barry drops a bomb - it was always a done deal, he had already promised he would go. He tries to justify it, but I am really mad at Barry at this point. He yells that "I have no other option! I'm at the point in my life where I don't have options." Besides, he was just trying to make a better life for Jake.

Leo nearly explodes, saying that he won't sit there and listen to his dad pretend that he cares about Jake. "But don't worry, dad, I'll clean up after you as I always do, but one thing I'll never do is be like you!" (Ooo!). Leo walks out, leaving his dad literally holding a bag.

Back at the office, it's night and the painters are at work. So is Izzy! Leo apologizes, and tells Izzy that he has to let the workers go in half an hour or Leo will be working for them. Izzy asks how he will ever get the job done? "I don't know."

The painters Leo hired are leaving, they wish him luck. Leo explains his family situation and Izzy says that "some things are unforgivable". She is inwardly pensive when she says this, which makes me wonder what she's thinking of when she said that. She comes up to Leo, and they hug and comfort each other.

Later that night, Izzy is sleeping on the floor as Leo works. Jake walks in to talk to Leo. David walks in, and when he realizes Jake is there having a moment with Leo, he stops. He is unnoticed. Jake says he doesn't want to be this responsibility, this burden. Leo reassures him, saying that it's just the two of them now. They are brothers. David quietly walks out. Jake tells Leo, "You'll never get this done on time", and picks up a brush. Mischeviously, Jake says, "I would have gone with white."

The next morning, David walks in. The camera pans all around. It's all clean, neat - and finished. Leo is sleeping on the floor, next to Jake. Leo gets up to greet David, this is a big moment. David looks all around and says, "Look at all this. You're a man of your word". Wow. David walks up to Leo, and the camera shows a close up of David shaking Leo's hand. Leo points behind himself and says, "That's my brother". David says "I know" and looks embarrassed at his little slip. He walks off, playing with a paint chip on the wall and saying "Oh well, that's ok". Looks back at Leo playfully. Leo stares at David's receding back, appraisingly, seeming to want to both say, "You s.o.b" and yet laugh at the same time at David's cheekiness.

At the Roth's, Barry is walking around in front of the family, asking if they have everything planned. How will they have dinner? It seems he thinks things will fall apart without him, when in fact he has been irrelevant for a lonnnng time. Hal says, "We won't miss a beat", without realizing what this will do to Barry. Barry starts to walk out, and he says to the family "I just thought I was doing what you wanted me to do." Leo says, "Dad, you don't have to". Barry says, "It's a little late for that. Barry pauses at the door, almost turns back, sighs, and keeps going.

Outside, he makes his farewells to everyone. The family almost in a line, and Barry walks up to each one and says goodbye. He invites Jake to come to Ohio. He apologizes to Leo. Leo replies, "I'm sorry for what I said". No hard feelings, they hug and and Barry says, "It'll be ok, Leo", and walks into the van, and the van pulls away as Barry puts his hand to the window. The van leaves.

Jake begins to cry his eyes out, and the family gathers around him. Leo hugs him as Rhonda and Hal watch. Jake has lost his mother to cancer, which turned him from a happy kid into a deeply wounded teen. Now he has lost his dad to neglect. The four bereft remaining Roths walk back into the house as the camera pulls up into the sky and Leo says, "Let's go home."

1-7 No Job Too Small--11/02/1996
Well, this is certainly Doug's episode. I liked his mumbled sense of humor before, and at the unveiling I loved the reasons why he invited himself and how he told Leo he wanted to go. Now, during this episode, he really shone, I am very proud of him. But I'm getting ahead of myself here . . .

Anyways, when I came in, Izzy was sitting sweetly on Leo's lap. They were both looking gently at Doug, who seemed quietly pleased at something. He said something like, "Well - I hadn't firgured on that". And the scene ends.

Next, we see Izzy at her new place, waltzing around cleaning and fixing it up. She happens upon an old sketch pad, a large one the kind that architects use. She flips through it, and discovers these masterful architect's original drawings of elevations of interesting-looking buildings.

By now, Doug has come up behind her unnoticed, and throws his keys on the counter next to him so that she'll know he's there. She turns around, startled, and casts about for excuses about how she was cleaning up and she found the drawings. Doug, true to life, fishes a can out of the cupboard and asks if Izzy wants some Raviolios. Izzy is not in the mood for it, and I got the impression they wanted us to know that Izzy thought Raviolios were beneath her, but that she was being nice about it.

Doug looks around for the can opener, and mumbles an "Oh my god" when he sees that the drawers are actually neat and clean. Of course, he can't find the can opener and Izzy explains how she has arranged things. So, where is the can opener? Izzy doesn't know either. They finally find it in a little can atop the counter.

Izzy gets curious, and in that cute-but-cautious way of hers asks Doug if knows about Leo's schooling. "He went to Cal state, right? And he was seriously trying to be an architect?" Doug responds, "He said he was".

As Doug gets up to leave, he wanted to talk to Izzy about "the blow dryer situation". Izzy shouldn't use the blow dryer because the wiring in their loft is not up to it. Izzy, of course, being a child of privilege relative to Doug, says that they should just get an electrician to come in and fix it. She wants to rename the problem "the electricity situation". Doug gets a little testy in that endearing way of his, and asks Izzy "Why should we bring in an electrician who will charge us thousands of dollars to fix something we don't own? I mean, we a re a hair gel kind of household, okay?". Befuddled, Izzy mumbles "Okay". Doug walks away, saying "Okay, thanks".

Now, Izzy is at Karen's. Karen is incredulous that Doug would say such a thing. Still, she says, give him a break, he may be feeling crowded by you. Izzy says, "I shouldn't have moved the furniture . . ." She then shows how she thinks by saying, "Leo asked me to make myself at home . . . so . . . I did . . . " Karen and Izzy convince each other that no one will notice the moved furniture anyway.

Next scene, of course, is of Leo and Doug coming home and looking around in shock at the way Izzy has arranged everything. There is a weird green contraption made of sticks lashed together. Doug goes to hang his coat from it, and Leo tries to prevent him, saying something like "We don't know what it is". Doug does it anyway. Doug says this must just be a "chick thing", for which sexist statement Leo chastises him.

At that moment, Rhonda arrives. She knows what the item is, of course, it's a Hopi ladder. (The Hopis are a Native American tribe). Rhonda also looks around in shock at the cleanliness and neatness, except she is pleased by it. Doug mentions the contraption, and Rhonda, who is a """chick""", says "Oh, what? The Hopi ladder?" So she knows what it is, and Leo sinks down on his chair, saying "I don't believe this".

While Rhonda continues to admire things, Doung says, "Well, yeah, she's trying to domesticate us - also a chick thing". Rhonda laughingly chides Leo, saying Don't let Doug's "homoerotic jealousies" blow this for you, you should be thanking Izzy and catering to her every want and need for this. Doug mumbles, "Well, in a minute I'm going to start getting defensive here". : ) He's great.

Rhonda humorously wants to know where Izzy is, because she's not sure she can talk to these guys anymore. She's at Karen and Allan's. Who are they? Doug answers that Karen is Izzy's sister, and Allen is her affluent husband after whom Leo model his life.

In fact, Leo is supposed to pick Izzy up from there, so he will get going. Doug invites himself and gets into the elevator with Leo, who looks puzzled. As the door closes, Doug points and says to Rhonda, "be sure to use the lesbian exit there". Rhonda gasps at this in incredulous humor. I guess Doug got her back, after all.

Doug and Leo arrive at Karen and Allan's. Allan's back is turned, and he is using these little simulated skis to practice skiing in a really goofy way. Leo coughs, which gets Allan's attention. He goes to talk to Leo and Doug, and I immediately dislike him. He is falsely glib, he is condescending, and he is friendly in a shallow way. He tells Leo, "I've been thinking about you and about your business". Doug seems surprised, and Leo looks like he wishes that Allan hadn't mentioned that.

Doug says, "Well, he already has an investment advisor, me. I mean, I found 35 cents in his pocket which were not earning interest so I was going to advise my client to invest them in a can of Raviolios." I loved him for this! Allan looks puzzled, and Leo explains that Doug means Leo doesn't have much to invest. Allan says that even so, Leo should really establish a relationship with a banker.

Karen returns, prattling on about how she spent a fortune at a shoe store. Shades of Imelda Marcos here, nice touch right after Doug mentions having to eat Raviolios. Doug and Karen say hello, and there is definitely a spark there! (You might remember that Doug fed Karen a few episodes back, when she showed up unannounced at the loft, and we saw the chemistry there).

Izzy admires the skis in that little girl way she admired Jen's earrings in The Unveiling. Allen raves about the parabolic skis, saying how you become suuuuuch a part of the mountain. At this point, I'm really hoping Allen becomes part of a mountain by crashing his plane into one.

Allan pressures Leo and Izzy into coming along on the ski trip, and when Leo says he doesn't ski, Allan snootily scoffs and gasps incredulously. I'm really ready to spring for Allan's solo flying lessons now.

Allen, oblivious to the Ravioli reference that Doug made, says to Leo, "Remember sushi? Well, take sushi and multiply it times threeeeee . . . " Leo looks embarrassed. Thanks a lot, Allan, I can barely feed myself and you're mentioning the sushi I can't afford that you probably treated me to.

Doug, Leo and Izzy enter their loft. Izzy walks around nervously, apologizing to both and especially to Doug for all the furniture she's moved, and especially for the new thing she brought in. Doug says, "What, the Hopi ladder? Yeah, in fact Leo and I were just looking for one, that's a nice one." While Izzy's back is turned, Leo gives him a slow look that made me roll in my bed laughing.

There is great blocking in this scene, where Izzy is in the background with her back to the camera, Leo is in the middle ground looking at Doug, and Doug's torso and face is in the foreground facing our left. Leo starts to talk about the blue bean bag chair, mumbling something about it and looking up at Doug frequently as if to say, "I'm bringing it up, when are you going to jump in here and help me out by speaking out about the concerns to told me about?" Doug unobtrusively walks out.

Izzy mentions that she found Leo's drawings, and Leo says, "You found some drawings . . . really?" He looks really scared and immobilized. "They were just. . .they're really nothing. Thanks". (Ooo, he was ok until that "thanks").

Doug walks back in and delivers one of his best scenes in an episode that has been full of good scenes for him. He is angry and assertive, but still the mumbling lovable Doug. He tells Izzy, "It's really ironic that you couldn't find a good place for the bean bag, because it already was in a perfect place, allow me to demonstrate". He then starts moving the bag, and all his other chairs and lamps back to their original place, explaining how he uses each of them and how it suited him where they were. He adds, "I'm ok with you being here, and I've tried to be as welcoming as I could, but you know, I live here too. I understand if Leo asked you"

Leo interjects, not threateningly, "Don't talk to her like that". Doug says, "I'm not talking to her like that, I'm talking to you like that. Isabel, if I have to negotiate with you for every square foot of space in this apartment I'll have an aneurism, and nobody wants that. Believe me." Hmmm, I guess we'll hear more about Doug's medical past in future episodes.

Doug leaves, and walks back saying, "One more thing. The can opener, it goes in the top drawer, not in that tin thing. Thank you."  And walks out.

At the Lukens home, Izzy packs for the ski trip as Leo watches. Leo finds her wearing pigtails in a kid picture. Hmmm, didn't Everett nickname Jen "pigtails"?

Leo wonders how much the trip will be, and he winces at Izzy's estimate of $150. Izzy tries to let him off the hook, but Leo is embarrassed and says it's ok, he was just wondering how much it was.

Next, we are at the loft alone with Leo as he tries out a (probably borrowed or gift) very cool ski outfit. Doug arrives, and makes good-natured fun of Leo. Karen, Allan and Izzy arrive and Allan literally jumps into the loft, making me wish for a trap door.

Doug imitates Allan's idiotic inflection, saying "Well, I'm gonna go scrape myself some roadkill for dinner now", and leaves.

It turns out that Izzy has proudly framed "Leo's" sketches, and Allan looks them over recognizing they have been done by other people. When Leo realizes what is happenning, he makes an excuse and leaves, which makes both me and Izzy really sorry for him. Allan crudely asks, "What, did he tell you these were his?" to which Izzy says, "No. It's just that he had his name on them! I should have known they were drawings of famous buildings."

Some other night, Leo and Doug are playing mini-golf. Doug quietly announces that he will be looking for another place to live. "I mean, I don't think I belong there and I think that's really clear". Leo is upset, but Doug says it's Leo's turn. (I love how in Relativity they don't make the scenes any longer than they have to be).

Leo and Izzy are at the loft, and Leo explains about the drawings - they were just class excercises, copies of famous drawings by other people. He wanted Izzy to love him for him, he is poor, and that may never change. He wants Izzy to face this, that those kinds of drawing may never come from the hands of Leo Roth.

Izzy wonders if her coming from a middle-class family is a problem for Leo, she can't help it after all. She says, "Has Doug been poisoning you against me?" Yeah, later we'll see exactly how Doug does this.

Leo responds, "That's ok, because Doug is moving out". This quiets Izzy, who says, "I don't know what to say, I mean, you asked me to move in here". She thinks that when they go skiing, they will have some space from the situation and spend some time together.

Leo says, "I'm not a skier. We don't have to spend every moment of our lives together". Oh, ohhh, this could easily turn into a breakup. There is sad music and a pregnant pause . . .

The next day, very early morning, Izzy is all zipped up in her cute snow outfit while Leo wakes up. She looks at him and softly asks,

Izzy- "This is a good idea . . . right?"
Leo -"Yeah, sure"
Izzy - "I mean, it will give you and Doug a chance to talk"

She then leaves. Leo pensively and affectionately puts her teddy bear's paw up against his lip, which Doug almost catches him doing as he shuffles his way to the bathroom. Leo follows him, talking, as Doug proceeds to use the urinal. Doug says, we're good friends, you're always giving me advice except this time it's you I need advice about. Doug says, "Keep the roommate who is better in bed". Leo doesn't laugh, but say "Well, obviously, that's you", but we still know it's a joke.

Leo tells Doug that she went skiing, which Doug thinks is a very bad idea. Leo should hurry up and catch up with her "before she hooks up with some stufly ski bum who really is Italian, I mean, you've seen this girl on vacation."

Leo explains that he can't go, because he "has reached a certain financial juncture". Doug realizes what is happening, and says that he will lend Leo the little money he's stashed away (probably after months of saving). "I mean, short term, high interest, but it's enough money. Not enough to impress Karen, maybe, but it's something". Somehow I doubt Doug will charge any interest whatsoever. Leo can only look at Doug in the same way I did: with great affection and admiration, with abject and helpless gratitude.

At Karen and Allan's, Allan is blithering again about something. Karen wanted it to be their weekend, but she couldn't very well disinvite Leo and Izzy. Besides, he tells Allan, maybe they will be inspired by the romance of Leo and Izzy, maybe they can takes notes or something. Hmmm, things are looking up for Doug.

Izzy arrives, senses the situation and after Allan leaves asks what's wrong. Karen says, "It's all changed . . ."

Leo arrives, and Izzy stares, surprised but not unhappy. She goes off with him to talk. Sitting on the stairs, Izzy asks gently what he's doing there. By way of explanation, Leo says that when he was 8 years old he moved to a new block. He met this skinny, strange kid who suttered and who was just a weirdo. But in his own mind, the weird kid was the master of the neighborhood, he showed Leo the best hills to skate down, and all the neighborhood shortcuts. He didn't need to do that for me.

Izzy looks at him and says, I'm glad, it's clear how easy it is to lose people.

Leo responds that he wants those kinds of drawings to he his. Maybe they won't. Izzy answers that maybe they will

Finally, it is probably 1 am after the skiing weekend. In a darkened loft, Doug and Izzy meet at the refrigerator, alone. How did Leo do skiing? Izzy just says, "Ummmm . . ." Doug smiles and says, "So, no Japan in 1998, then?" referring to the winter Olympics.

Izzy is drinking milk out of the container, and Doug fishes out a beer. Izzy separates an Oreo cookie's two wafers, and Doug points at that, saying how it is that when you separate the wafers, more cream sticks to one wafer than to another. He is emotionally involved in this, so we know he means something else.

Izzy knows too, and she asks, "Are you saying that Leo is the cream? Because I think that you're the cream. And I don't want you to feel like you are this creamless wafer, because that's really not true".

Doug convincingly play-acts by saying, "We're just talking about Oreos, right?" Just as convincingly, Izzy casually says, "Yeah".

Doug offers his beer in a salute, and Izzy "clinks" it with the quart of milk. They have a moment as they stand comfortably together in the refrigerator light. A moment more, and we fade out . . .

1-8 Jake Gets A Job--10/08/1996
So Jake be-bops carefreely into a business called Epicenter, which we immediately recognize as the magazine where Izzy and David (Izzy's dad). He's playing with a small rubber ball / hackeysack thing as he enters, and ineffectively mumbles something about Izzy, Leo, the work that Leo did and the fact that he's looking for a glue gun that Leo left there when he did the painting job in "Fathers"

The secretaries seem a little perturbed by him, and they handle him with authority. Jake wanders around, and walks up to the entrance to David's office. David is enthralled with something on his computer, and barely pays contemptuous attention to Jake. Jake notices that David is playing computer golf, and David is amazed. "You play computer golf?!" Jake takes over the game, and impresses David with how easy it is for him. This makes David buddy up to Jake, in a friendly and accepting way.

Isabel stops by, and her eyes bug out as she sees Jake hanging out with her dad. She says hello, and her dad treats the situation like the most natural thing in the world. Izzy is also hesitant and unsure, not demonstrating the biggest vote of confidence in Jake. They essentially ignore her and she walks away, feeling dismissed.

At the loft, Izzy and Leo are discussing the encounter. Leo is very surprized, when Izzy tells him that Jake spent 45 minutes with her dad. We can see that Leo is feeling left out, and so does Izzy which causes her to tell him, "Don't worry, dad is really beginning to like you, too". This drew the biggest hoot so far from me, as the implications of that statement hit Leo and he pauses with this look on his face. But, Izzy reassures Leo, her dad really did like Jake.

Next, Leo is in the Roth home and walks into Leo's bedroom. Jake is laying on his bed watching TV, and Bailey (the "worthless brother's friend" whom we first meet in "Moving in") is sitting on the floor next to the bed watching, too. They ignore Leo as Leo prattles on about his visit to David, and where is the glue gun. Without taking his eyes off the TV, Bailey says to Jake, "You're in trouble".

Leo forecefully denies this, and we see that he is trying to emotionally reach Jake and failing miserably. He wants to be a part of Jake's life, and all Jake has eyes for right now is the TV. Leo tries one more time, "Where is their grandfather?" He's out playing bridge. "Where is Rhonda", their sister? She works (as a waitress) til midnight. Leo makes some sort of offer to come over for dinner, which Jake doesn't accept but Bailey jumps at, and is ignored. Leo, deflated and ignored, walks out. We see a closeup of Jake's face, his eyes covertly looking at the spot where Leo was standing, with a mixture of relief and regret. We hear the apartment door shut as Leo leaves.

At the Epicenter office, Izzy walks into her dad David's office. Didn't he buzz her? Yes, he did. David says that someone is leaving their job, so they need to look for someone to fill the "gofer" job. David suggests that Jake might be a good candidate. Izzy gushes that this would be great for Jake, then stops to say,"Wow, you'd actually give Jake a job?" David notices this, and asks, "He't not a weirdo or anything, right?" Izzy reassures him, non-sequiteurishly saying that "well, you know, with his dad gone." David says, "yes, well, I know there is the offbeat family." Izzy mentions Rhonda, and David derisively remembers her, "Ah, yes, the lesbian bartender". Izzy takes offense at this, and with good reason, because David didn't say those words very respectfully. David is contrite, and she is offended on Jake's behalf. Frowning, she discouragingly says, "Well, I'll mention it, see if he's available. He might not be." She tries to make it all ok by smiling at the end, but it doesn't work. She leaves his office.

Next, we see Jen hanging out at the office, near Izzy's desk. Izzy walks up to it, says hi to Jen, who is all bubbly about something.  Jen asks Izzy what she's doing the 21st, and Izzy checks her calendar which has a yellow sticky attached to it. Izzy reads it, and remembers, it's Jen's birthday!!! Izzy says, "Good, I'll call Karen", an impulse which Jen rushes to quell. Hmmm, I guess we're supposed to see there are other lines of tension in this family. Jen backpedals, saying that she doesn't want a big party and prefers to go through these things alone. She should live life on her own. By the way, Jen's therapist is hot, according to Jen.

At the loft, Leo and Izzy are brushing their teeth side-by-side. So, Leo asks, this job for Jake was entirely her dad's idea, right? Well, yes, Izzy knows that her dad is not a warm guy. Leo is concerned that Jake will screw up, because Jake doesn't show up when Leo is his boss.

We're now at a seedy game arcade, where Jake is playing a motorcycle video game and ignoring Leo as he comes up to Jake. Leo begins to speak, and Jake asks, "What'd I do?". Jake is not letting Leo in, in this episode. Leo talks to Jake about the job, and makes it sound like the most menial, boring job in the world, bad in every possible way. It's all lame errands and getting coffee. Jake's response shows his thinking, he says that David thinks Jake could play golf at the pro level. Jake is asking questions, but doesn't hang around for the answer, making Leo chase him all over the arcade. Leo gives up, and Bailey takes over Jake's motorcycle game, standing up on the seat. He sees Leo, and casually greets him.

Rhonda and grandpa are sitting around the table talking to Jake, who is ignoring them while eating a donut. They are giving conflicting advice about how to behave at the interview, and what to wear, and how much to say. While grandpa and Rhonda dissolve into a disagreement, Jake finishes his donut, and gets up without looking at them or ever saying a word.

Jake is in the reception area, as we see this tall, elegant-looking guy doing his post-interview finale. Yes, he has these credentials from Stanford, references, etc. And, he seems to have reached great rapport with the office manager, as they commiserate over her dog. Well, there is his resume, and the office manager reassures him that she gets to pretty much pick the person, and his resume is at the top.

Jake is not encouraged by this, and begins to walk out. David calls him back, and Jake says "I don't even have a resume, so..." and begins to walk out again. David fixes him with a smiling stare, and holds up some diskettes. "I got the new golf game upgrade!".

Rather than interview Jake, they are sitting around his computer golf game, and David is complaining about how poorly he is doing, and praising Jake's skill to the heavens. He asks Jake's advice, which surprises and flatters Jake. Jake says that David has a "reality problem", he knows how to play golf in real life, and he is trying to apply those skills to a computer game. He should play this game "in another dimension". Dave tries it, and makes the shot.

At the Roth's, Leo brings in some groceries. Jake is on the couch, and grouchily says, "I know where the grocery store is". He announces to Leo that he got the job. Leo is surprised and doubtful, and comments that "this is not good for you and me working together". Jake says he thought Leo didn't want him to. Leo pushes it, saying that "Jake, you'll show up, right? I mean, this is Izzy's dad and this could be bad for me". Jake gets the message, and is disgusted, saying "I''l show up, I won't make you look bad". He turns around on the couch, opens a newspaper and ignores Leo.

At the Epicenter library, Izzy and the office manager discuss how David is letting Jake drive the family's Explorer. Wow, Izzy says, he never let her drive that car because Izzy was not on the insurance policy. The office manager gives Izzy lots of static about how they should have picked the elegant guy. David bumps into them, and asks the office manager to put Jake on the insurance policy for the Explorer.

Jake arrives at the Lukens' door with a package. Jen opens the door, and we see sparks! Jake does his usual mumbling / want to leave thing, but Jen grasps for conversation, and keeps him there.  She asks Jake to help her zip up her dress, into which she doesn't quite fit, and he agrees. Gee, I wonder why? : )

Inside the house, Jen blathers on and on while Jake tries to help with the zipper. We realize this is Izzy's dress, and Jen doesn't fit, and the zipper breaks. Jen runs upstairs, and asks Jake, "Can you believe I'm 21 and still doing this kind of thing?" Jake leaves.

At Epicenter, Jake is hanging out in David's office with Bailey and some other guy. The place is a mess, the friends have photocopied their butts, and Izzy walks in. They spill the contents of a desk drawer, and they mouth a totally insincere "Sorry". Izzy kicks them out nicely, apologizing to Jake. As they leave, we see her face and she has good reason to be that angry.

Later, Jake is making his dinner in the office microwave late at night. Leo walks up, and asks "So, do you, like, hang out here at night now?" Jake is defensive, asking Leo to quit checking up on him. "I just had some friends over, OK? The people there don't think I'm a stupid screw-up.

Izzy and Leo are in bed, and Izzy is incredulous. "You didn't say anything to Jake?  They were trashing the office! Why is everyone so afraid of Jake?" Leo explains that Jake has essentially lost his whole family, and decries the distance between he and Jake.

Izzy suggests that maybe Leo could take Jake out to dinner, and Leo says it's not their style, "We might as well go out to a masked ball, it's not the way we do things." Izzy is understandably grumpy about this, saying "What you're doing now is not working".

At the Lukens', Eve is sitting at the table with Jen, doing her psychology homework. She is pondering why, when a teenager is in trouble, the family needs the teen to play out that role, and why they subconsciously conspire to keep him that way.

This is actually good psychology; when a family's emotional expression is constricted, each person assumes a role that the others are emotionally prevented from playing in the family. Thus, we get the hero child, the black sheep, the loving and understanding person. Rather than each person being a whole individual, the family gets fragmented into a group of stereotypical roles. Since they all need each other to play that role, when someone wants to break out of it, the other people resist. Sort of in the way that Leo resists seeing Jake as anything but a stupid screw-up.

Anyways, Jake walks in and Eve asks him if he knows any troubled teens, and Jake says "Everyone I know is like that". Eve asks him why the teen continues the behavior, and Jake says that it's so the parents will talk to them. Eve has an epiphany about this, and comments on how much more compassionate that interpretation is. Jake is there just to deliver a package, and tries to leave, but Jen begs him to stay, "Please don't leave me here alone with this psychobabble".

Leo is waiting at a greasy spoon restaurant, when Jake and Bailey show up. Leo is not happy that Bailey is there, and shows how uncomfortable this unusual thing of getting together for dinner with Jake is. Leo asks about the job, and Jake gets defensive saying how they are not jerks there, and how they ask your opinion and they value what you say. Jake mentions that he's invited to a surprise party for Jen, which really alarms Leo. What Leo wants to say is, "Jake, you are so much below Jen, you are so much more lower class, don't get your hopes up, ok?" What he actually says is, "Jake, Jen is in an entirely different league, (I would have said, "Oh yeah?  What about you and Izzy? I guess that tells us your thoughts about yourself, doesn't it, Leo?) Leo continues, "Don't forget that you are, you know, an employee". Jake gives up, and he's "gotta go".

Jake and Bailey are at Jen's surprise party. Jen almost hugs Jake, and because of the emotional rush I got, I realized how much I want Jake to get Jen!!. We see different scenes of the party, including one of Bailey doing the spoon-sticking-to-his-nose trick. Leo is there as Jake rummages through the fridge, and Leo is not very nice about saying, "Well, you and your friend managed to crash the party". Jake prepares to leave, but for the second time David sees this and pulls him back in.

Jake walks into the Lukens' garage, and finds Jen sitting in the Explorer. She is unhappy about how this 21st birthday means her childhood is over. He asks Jake, "Can we, like, go somewhere" which brought very strong bittersweet memories, if you are an MSCL fan you know what I mean. Jake offers to drive.

Jake takes her to the game arcade, where Jen is playing it up like a teenager again. She says that she'll always come here. Outside, as they are walking in high spirits back to the car, Jen says that she feels 18 again.

They get into the car and Jen says, "You're a really good guy, Jake. You are different, funny, smart. Dad keeps talking about you as 'unrealized potential'. He loves you. We all do." Jake's ears prick up on hearing this, and so do mine. Jake doesn't play Mr. Mumbles, for once, thank heavens. He looks directly at Jen and says, "Even you?" Jen responds spiritedly, "Oh, yeah, especially me. I'm your biggest fan . . . you know what I wish . . . ?"

I was getting really happy at this point!! I was mentally encouraging Jake and cheering him on by thinking, "Bryyy-an! Bryyy-an! Bryyy-an!"

Jen says, "You know what I wish? . . . . I wish you were my little brother, too".

Jake discreetly rolls his eyes, as do I. he says, "Oh, yeah. Me too.". he closes his eyes in pain, and backs up the Explorer out of the parking spot, crashing into another car. Jen says, "Eeek! My dad is going to kill you!"

Jake shows up at the loft, where Leo was alone. He explains that he wrecked David's car. Leo is going to have a conniption. Jake says, "Well, I didn't wreck it, it's just a fender-bender" But Jake wants Leo to talk to David for him, to explain what happened. "I need you, Leo".

Leo understandably blows up at this, and tells Jake to take responsibility, for once. "We're killing ourselves trying to help you, and you are, like, oblivious to it. Do you think you're the only one who is upset that dad left?" Jake tries to do his patented turn-around-and-leave thing, and Leo stops him. "Stay, and listen for once, don't just leave because you heard something you didn't like". Jake blows up, saying that Leo is just jealous that the Lukens liked him more than Leo.

The next morning, Jake walks up to David's office. David is upset because it'll cost $2,000 to fix the Explorer. David chides Jake. "We trusted you, and you blew it. We treated you like a friend of the family. I know there are a million and a half lame reasons why it happened, but I don't want to hear them." Jake is stricken on hearing this, and thinks he's fired, saying "Well, I'll see you around".

For the third time, David calls him back and says, "We're not going to walk out on you just because you screwed up", which is probably a painful reminder to Jake about his dad leaving. Jake asks, "You mean I'm still working here?" and David answers, "Unless you can think of a better way to pay me back. At $50 a week, you'll be paying me to work here", which is a nice counterpoint to Leo's comment about the painters he hired in Fathers. Jake begins to walk away, not believing what happened, and David says, "By the way, the next time your friends decide to Xerox your butts, make sure you don't cause a paper jam", and he throws a wadded-up paper at Jake, who catches it. After Jake leaves, David chuckles.

Leo arrives at the Roths' to see Bailey and Grandpa playing cards. Grandpa mentions that "David is a real mensch, we are going out bowling". Leo walks around fretting about stuff, and grandpa happily says, "We are ok here", which reminds me of the scene where Barry walked around wondering how they would all get along without him, when in fact he had become irrelevant long ago. Leo was looking around because he needed help with some work, and Bailey chimes in with "I'm available", which is ignored.

Leo comes to the Epicenter office, where he meets David and thanks him for forgiving Jake. David answers that he needs someone to look out for him, Jake needs a father, especially after how Barry left. This irks Leo, and David says Leo is misunderstanding him. He reassuringly tells Leo that he is not Jake's father.

Leo returns to the Roths', and Jake is there, eating real food, for once. Leo says that he wants them all to be a family, and he compares them to the Lukens family which seems loving and normal and together. He stops trying so hard, and tells Jake,

Leo: "I'm sorry about this whole . . ."
Jake: "You were just trying . . . maybe you don't need to try so hard . . . maybe you just need to be my brother".
Leo: "Maybe . . ."
Jake: "Maybe I don't need anything else."
Leo: "Maybe me neither."

Leo begins to leave, but Jake asks him to stay. We see a shot of them from behind, their heads and shoulders over the back of the couch, sitting close side by side, sharing the food and making appreciative noises about how good the food is. They hold the camera on this silent scene for a perfect 10 seconds, and we slowly fade to black.

1-9 Jealousy--11/23/1996
So, as the episode begins everyone is piling into the elevator heading for the loft, and I mean everyone. Izzy, Leo, Karen, Jen, Dean the head-banging poet, Allan - everyone.

Doug and Allan discuss whether they'd have sex with Hillary Clinton. "You mean, like, for pleasure, or to save the world?" I could tell this was going to be a very appealing episode. : ) But, you know, Doug says, who is growing into something very bed-worthy is Chelsea Clinton. Karen joins in the joke and points out that this would be illegal, but the men insist that when she's filled out and ready, they would drink her bath water.

Jen says something about Ethan Hawke being in a movie, and Dean gets very upset by this, pointing out how obssessed Jen is over Ethan Hawke.

The elevator gets stuck on the way up, and while everyone else is cool, ok, let's see what we can do, Allan starts to panic, climbing the metal lattice that is the elevator door, and screaming for hellllllllp through the crack around a door. Leo snorts in amusement and says, "He's good in a crisis".

The elevator starts again, and they all spill out into the loft, all still talking animatedly. Allan tells Leo about his client, Julia Cordoza. She is an architect, and Leo had architectural aspirations, as we remember from a previous episode. She has a painting job she'd like done, and Allan thinks she and Leo would hit it off, that there would be sparks (professional sparks, according to Allan's oblivious demeanor). Allan is really excited about this gig match-making, but it's all making Izzy feel insecure. Exactly how much is Leo going to love working with Julia?

Meanwhile, Doug and Karen are lounging amid the hub-bub, and just to look at them you can see the great chemistry between them. Doug wants to talk about cars, and we remember that Karen has had trouble with hers and is considering getting a new one.

At the same time, Dean is still reproaching Jen about Ethan Hawke, saying "You mean you'd like it if I grew a goatee and became a brooding non-verbal?", which is a great line. I have never understood the appeal for women of men like that.

Later, Leo is in the shower and Izzy is brushing her teeth and looking insecure. They discuss how obvious it was that Karen and Doug were flirting. Izzy is insecure about the sparks flying with Juliet, so she asks Leo if he would drink her (Izzy's) bath water. He says yes, reassures her, they kiss, and they slowly sink to the floor to do who knows what. : )

Next, we are at Julia's apartment. Apparently there is no one there, and he looks around in stunned appreciation at how nice and well-decorated it is. Off-camera, we hear Julia's voice yelling out, "Are you the painter?". She comes out, and they meet and trade pleasantries. She shows him the stain on the wall, and she asks, "What do you see? I see a girl on a mountain." Leo sees a lion on a hammock. She Hmmmms over this. His name is Leon, like a lion, right? No, just Leo.

She hands him a cup of this incredibly good cappuccino, and he has an orgasm over it, it's so good. She has to go, and as she makes her exit, Leo asks what happened to make the stain on the wall. She says that she tried to cook a turkey, but the turkey exploded.

At the used car lot, we see Izzy and Karen strolling a little diffidently and looking at cars. They are talking about how Julia is such a fireball, and it is very obvious to everyone by now that Izzy is very jealous of Julia, except to Leo and Karen, at least as far a we know. Doug who, you remember, is a used car salesman comes over and greets the women. He chit chats with them, and the whole 'feel' of he and Karen together is just great! I wanted them to kiss right then! : )

Karen warn Doug that she is just looking around at cars, and that nothing will happen that day, so be gentle with her. Doug double-entendres that he will be gentle with her, as he always is the first time. Karen stumbles about what kind of car she wants, and Izzy comes to her rescue by saying that she wants something dependable, reliable. Aha, well, then, Doug has just the thing for her. Of course, that means a white open-top convertible Porsche. Izzy is concerned, but Karen is already seduced, "Look at this leaaatherr . . ."

Next, Julia comes home while Leo is spackling the walls. She's very excited about having landed her first job on her own! Leo congratulates her, as she unloads some grocery bags. Julia gets a call, and at first we think it's her boyfriend because of the defensiveness in Julia's voice, but she explains to Leo that it's her mom. She is so excited about the new job that she is going to celebrate by cooking, and she hopes that Leo likes Pesto. Pesto? Yes, Pesto.

At the loft, Leo and Izzy are sitting and talking to each other. Izzy wants to know about Julia, and Leo's eyes light up (as much as they can) and he prattles on about how amazing she is. Izzy swallows. "Amazing?" Izzy is insecure, and Leo is totally clueless about it. Leo says, "You remember how you interned at Rolling Stone magazine?" Like Izzy, Leo wants to be an assistant, except he wants to be a paid assistant. Leo thinks there are career opportunities for him there. Leo finally clues in, and asks her "What? You've got that look". "No, I think it's a great idea." She finally notices that Leo hasn't touched the food she has served him, and she asks him, "Is there something wrong with the pesto?" Leo unenthusiastically twirls it on his fork and says, "No, it's ok".

After the commercial, Leo is nervously practing with Izzy what he will say to Julia. "I couldn't help overhearing that you're starting an office. I know I don't have any experience, but...." Izzy interrupts and says to focus on the positive, stop apologizing. Tell me why you want to work for me." Leo goes into this rapture about how inspired he was when he saw her at work, and we can see how this makes Isabel feel. He says that what he lacks in experience he will make up for with enthusiasm, and he won't take No for an answer:. She says that was great, and Leo loses his confidence and responds, "Yeah, like I'd really say that."

Karen and Izzy are sitting on some stairs, apparently at the Lukens' and they are disussing the car, which Izzy thinks is too much for Karen. Karen takes umbrage at this, and says, "What? You think it's too interesting for me?". Izzy backs off and says no, she just wants to make sure that she's getting the car for the right reasons, not because Doug is charming her into it, or because he's flirting with her. Karen's ears prick up. "Flirting? You mean it shows? I was wondering about that, I mean, I thought it was just my imagination, but you see it, too so I guess it's ok". Izzy says you're a married woman, but Karen points out that Allan is such a flirt, too. He flirts with such beautiful clients as Julia. Jen comes down the stairs, very vivacious, and says, "Let's go buy the Porsche".

Leo arrives at Julia's, and they start talking about the project she's on. She's designing a school for very young children, sounds like a kindergarten. (Love those compound German words!) He thinks it's great that she's desigining it from the point of view of the child. Julia asks Leo to imagine what it must look like to the child to leave "the safety of the womb of a Volvo and be pushed into a school". Leo thinks he sees an opportunity, and jumps in with an idea about how to make the school appealing, to make it look like a ship, with portholes and by making the brushed steel look like waves. After all, they are going on a journey. It's a brave attempt, but it's all improbable and Julia looks at him with a rictus of a smile and says "It's an idea". Leo pushes on, and he makes his pitch right then and there to be hired by Julia. She dithers, but he launches into the speech he didn't think he'd be confident enouh to say to Julia, ending with "and I won't take no for an answer".

Meanwhile, back at the loft, Doug and Izzy are commiserating over how Leo isn't there. Doug says, Hmmm, it's 8:30, that's highly irregular. Izzy sarcastically says that they must be really getting painted over there, or going strong on all the incredibly good capuccino she has. Izzy explains that while in Italy, she and Leo must have gone a thousand times to this excellent capuccino place. Memories of how the romance started. She asks Doug if he thinks she should call Leo at Julia's? Doug looks at her and says, "You mean check up on him?" "No, I mean, he could have gotten injured. You know, he could have gotten one of those painting injuries". (Sorry, but I had to laugh my head off at this point.) Doug says that he's getting a vibe about Izzy being jealous, and he doesn't think there's a reason for that. The phone rings, and Izzy casually dives for it. It's Leo at Julia's, and he announces that he might have the job. She has to talk about it with other people, but he has a feeling. He feels a connection to Julia in her job. Izzy makes an unconscious double-entendre about how he should evaluate what he would lose versus what he would gain. Julia comes up to Leo, and they start talking excitedly about work, and Leo tells Izzy that he has to go. He will be home soon. Izzy answers with false casualness, "Whenever". After she hangs up, she and Leo trade looks and Izzy smiles a tight, resigned smile at Doug, which admits she is jealous after all.

The next morning, while Leo and Izzy are dead asleep, the phone rings and Leo gets up to pick it up. It's Julia, asking Leo to bring the camera so they can take photos of the job site. He agrees, and after hanging up asks Izzy if he can take her camera, since his is broken. She says sure. Leo walks past Doug's room, which has some cool and funny papier mache heads hanging in it. He tells Doug he'll be home late, to which Doug responds with "Interesting". Doug wants to know if Julia is attractive, and Leo acts all puzzled about why Doug would want to know such a thing. Doug says that it's interesting he will be late again because Izzy was waiting for him up until, like, forever.

Isabel and Karen come home to the Lukens to find Jen staring off into space. They look on with concern, and Jen mumbles, still staring, that "He's suffocating me". Dean shows up right then, and offers to take her to her class (?) which Jen points out pointedly is four hours long. He says he'll wait. Izzy and Karen choose that moment to discreetly tiptoe away from that one.

They comment on what a poor guy Dean is, how besotted he is with Jen, and how Karen wishes that Allan were that attentive to her. Is that why she flirts with Doug, to make Allan jealous? No. From far away and without hearing what they are saying, we see poor Dean trying to be sweet to Jen, who is just sitting there tolerating it. I agree, poor Dean.

Karen and Izzy discuss Leo, and how Izzy wishes that he were so inspiiiired by a 45-year old fat guy who sweats. Karen asks about jealousy, and Izzy says she's not jealous. She's pictured Julia under a big truck a few times, but she's not jealous. Izzy realizes that this is really unhealthy, but she breaks down and asks Julia to tell her all about Julia.

Julia and Leo are at the beach on their field trip, taking pictures of the site where Julia's architecture project will take place. Julia asks how Leo is in relationships, and Leo finally brings up his girlfriend. "You know Karen - it's her sister". Julia guesses that she knew all along, and tensely suggests that she and Leo should come over for dinner at some point. Leo stumbles, "You mean tonight?" and Julia stammers that she hadn't planned it so soon, but yes, that's ok. Julia will cook, and with any luck there will be no explosions.

At the used car lot, Allan is under the Porsche but, alas, it's voluntary. He's suspiciously checking out the engine of the Porsche while Doug makes fun of him, "What are you doing under there, did you lose a quarter?" Allan resists the idea of the Porsche, but Doug says that thiscar looks great on Karen, and that there may be a side of Karen that Allan is unaware of. Allan is right to get defensive over this, that was a bit much. He asks, "You mean, there are sides to my wife that you know about that I don't?" "No, it's just that she may be a great Prosche driver" Karen thanks Doug for that one, and I get the idea that Allan doesn't think much of Karen's abilities. Allan lets go, and say, "This is so stupid. It's obvious that you are trying to sell us on buying this very expensive car". Doug responds that it's not really expensive, he's letting it go for 18 thousand. Allan pierces Doug with a laser stare. "18 thousand?!" vrrooooooooooooom, we are flying down the streets of LA as Allan drives and Karen bounces from side to side in the back seat and while Doug and Allan whoop it up in the front. Yeah, Allan is into this car.

At the loft, Karen is distressed to report to Izzy that Allan and Doug are officially friends, they have bonded over the car. Meanwhile, Izzy frets over what she will wear to the dinner with Julia, and realizes she's being competitive about it. She's just wear her usual ordinary stuff, nothing fancy.

Izzy arrives at Karen's, dressed in something that is very sexy yet at the same time slightly ridiculously overdressed. Julia comes out, barefoot and happy. They chit chat, and Leo tells the story of how he and Izzy met. Izzy is getting comfortable, because they seem to be celebrating their relationship, but as they talk about the places they used to visit in Italy, Julia remarks on the great architechtural details around that piazza, and the conversation becomes about Leo and Julia and the bond that they have over this stuff. Julia prattles on about "curvilinear" lines in the architecture, which Leo enourages and Izzy look at Leo strangely (but dissimulated) because we can see she doesn't even think that Leo even knows what "curvilinear" means. The cat is out of the bag: Leo has accepted the job, and Izzy hides her upset over the fact that Leo hasn't discussed it with her.

Back at the loft, Izzy reproaches Leo. "I thought you were going to tell me!" Leo chooses the wonderfully soothing phrase, "It just happened in the moment". Izzy is not pleased by this. Leo says he trusts Julia, and Izzy loses it. "You trust this barefoot woman, it's too intense, too curvilinear, has he even worked out the benefits and the vacations, and whether they are paid vacations? You didn't think of me when you accepted that job, maybe I want to do something that doesn't pay much (meaning Leo should take a breadwinning job). I do insignificant stuff at my job at Epicenter, I xerox memos and scan the classifieds and I can't go on field trips to look at beach homes and sit driking capuccino all day and I'm jealous of your job, and (she starts crying) I'm going to lose you to her". Whatever else Izzy was saying, that broke my heart at that moment. I'm an unconventional guy in many ways, I'm a strong feminist, for one thing, but when a girlfriend or a woman I like is crying - it's all over, I'm putty in her hands. Luckily, I don't pick girlfriends who would use this against me, so it's never been a problem, but I sure am sentimental. And so it is with Izzy, despite her selfish purported reason for her jealousy, I felt bad about her insecurity.

And besides, Izzy says, "Julia is attracted to you, you knew that, right? You can tell" Leo sits next to her, the both of them looking away from each other, looking defeated.

The next morning, Leo arrives at Julia's and asks about benefits. Julia immediately catches on, asking if someone said something about it? Isabel? Leo says yes, and goes on to make me slap my forehead by telling Julia that Isabel thinks Julia is attracted to him. Julia says, "Hey - I'm a professional, I wouldn't do that. Take the day off and think about it, if you are going to do this year-long project I need you here, not wondering about stuff." He thanks her and is about to leave when she adds, "You are not bad-looking. I wouldn't want you to get a complex over that." Leo gives her a sarcastic "Thanks a lot" look as he leaves.

Izzy arrives at the loft to find Leo. Leo tells Izzy how much he appreciates her, and says that he won't take the job. "It's just a job, I'll wait until something comes along that we're more comfortable with". Izzy seems more at ease, and says it's ridiculous, you shouldn't let the job go because of my insecurity. Leo looks grateful and says, "You're right". She looks at him, seeming to wish the answer were no, and asks, "So, are you going to take it?"

Next, we are outside the Lukens home as the Lukens women - Jen, Karen and Izzy - sit on the lawn and watch their men - Doug, Allan and Dean - exult over the open hood of the Porsche parked on the street in front of the house. Karen remarks how what's really going on is that they are using the engine power to disguise the fact that "I'm insecure that the other guys' penises might be bigger than mine". Jen remarks that Leo and Izzy's relationship is so healthy it's nauseating. Leo arrives in his dumpy car, which is not a Porsche. He saunters up to the women, sits next to Izzy and Karen leaves, discreetly pulling Jen along with her. Leo tells her that he will take the job, and Izzy seems genuinely happy and excited for him. He looks off to watch the Porsche party, and Izzy's expression melts into one of insecurity as she looks off to the side, pensively.

We think the episode is over, but as the credits roll, we see the camera looking up at the men talking over the open hood. This looks like the actors just hanging out, improvising. Dean says he wishes he had a Miata, and Doug tells him that's such a woman's car, which amazes Dean. Doug says, "Oh, yeah, when you buy one you get this huge three-gallon bottle of perfume with it, you should come down to the lot and I'll show you". This cracks up Leo, and the screen fades to black at that point.

1-10 Role Model--12/14/1996
the entire Lukens clan - the sisters and the parents, are making their arrival at night at this typical fancy Hollywood/Los Angeles event. They're all dressed formally, and are chattering amiably and you can feel excitement in the air. Everyone except David, the dad, he's blabbering about how this awards ceremony is nothing, but we can see that it is something, and that he's really worried. We see signs that let us know these are the 1996 American Magazine Awards. (The gentle reader will recall that David runs a magazine called Epicenter, and that Izzy works there).

On their way into the fancy ballroom, they meet up with a distinguished-looking older gentleman whom David greets very warmly. It's Professor Robert Levinson, who taught a Politics and (something) class that David took.

During the ceremony, Hazel wins the 1996 award for excellence in journalism and thanks people. I am quite sure we'll never see Hazel again in this series. :) Then, the 1996 award for best magazine is announced - it's Epicenter!! David is overjoyed, and gives a very short speech where he says that "we're just an upstart", thanks everyone in the staff, and then gets all sentimental about how (pause) there was this one person who inspired him, who gave him guts, who believed that he could set the world on fire. The camera cuts from one Lukens woman to another, each looking a little bashful yet proud, and it pays special attention to Eve. The person who inspired David so was . . .Professor Levinson! Eve looks completely stricken.

At the post-ceremony party, Karen asks Izzy and Jen (and not for the first time) "Should we tell him?" Izzy says no, mom doesn't seem to mind. David, who is still babbling in a giddy stupor, turns around and says that it's time to pass on the torch, it has to happen at some time, and says to Izzy "You know the section of the magazine called Quake Notes? That's yours!" There is great consternation and excitement at this. Apparently, Quake Notes has always been David's baby, David is QN, and he's giving it to Izzy while under the influence.

Back at the Lukens', dad is still celebrating and babbling, and kissing everyone. Eve still looks quietly hurt. Eve goes upstairs, and calls back to David, "You coming upstairs?" to which David replies, "Right away, dear". The three sisters wonder, "Do you think they'll . . . " to which Karen replies, "That's too gross to contemplate.

Upstairs, in the master bedroom, David continues to babble amiably about the whole thing, obviously guilty at being obsessed with every single second of the event. He has "dreamed about that moment for years, and then it was just a blur". Did he talk for 45 minutes? To which Eve pointedly replies, "No, it was surprisingly brief". This, of course, is lost on David. How was the speech?, yaddy yaddy yadda.

Downstairs, the Lukens girls continue to contemplate the fact that Izzy has QN now, and Izzy is delighted because that means that she is going to turn out like her dad, and not like her mom. Again, Karen wonders if they should tell dad that he has hurt mom by not mentioning her at the speech. This is ignored, and Izzy continues, saying "Mom is the sweetest, kindest person, but I want to do something with my life and if I turn out like her, I swear that I'll die". Unfortunately, Eve was about to come down the stairs at that moment, and she heard the whole thing. With resignation and without being noticed, she goes back upstairs. The women hear the soft creaking, and they silently turn pale.

Next day, back at the loft, Izzy is obssessed with whether her mother heard her, and is using Leo as an audience, positioning him at the same distance and repeating the statement, "If I grow up like her, I'll die" and Leo tries to say something soothing about how barely audible it was. It seems to be hitting him how screwy this all is. It's evident on his patient face.

Izzy says that because she now has QN, she must be turning into her dad, which is violating some rule of the Universe, and comments on how Electra-esque this is (!!). Leo carefully asks if the sisters are ok with Izzy being picked, and Izzy says, "Of course. (Haughty frown) Why wouldn't they be? We're not competitive".

At the Epicenter parking lot, dad is now sober - and quite sobered by the memory that he has promised his baby, Quake Notes, to his idiot daughter, AHEM, excuse me, sorry, that was a typo, I mean his younger daughter, Izzy. : )

He tries to gingerly backslide, saying "You didn't want this, like, two years from now or something, did you?" Izzy is oblivious, and says no, I'm really excited, I have these ideas. David grimaces discreetly and says something like, "Oh, good".

As they enter the office, a party atmosphere prevails, and the returning hero gets lots of congratulations from all the people at the office. Izzy wonders if now that she's doing QN, shouldn't she technically sit in the office with her dad? David is grimacing, because this other person (whose name I forget - she's an overweight black lady in her 30s) was apparently being groomed to take over QN, until David made his unwise promise to Izzy. That makes two people whose expectations David has dashed in this episode.

At the staff meeting, they discuss Max's excellent piece on Operation Rescue. He recounts how the whole magazine started off as Quake Notes when it was just a badly-mimeographed and stapled-together incendiary little pieces of paper that they thought no one would read. And now, QN is a column in Epicenter, and it's time to pass on the torch - to Izzy! The black lady looks deflated, and gets a very slight disappointed smirk that says, "Nepotism". David says, in fact Izzy has ideas for Quake Notes. Izzy stands up and babbles brightly about how terrified she is, and about her very vague ideas. This quietly deflates he entire staff, and David steps in, offering guiding comments which Izzy just eats up. "Yeah, yeah, I'll put that in, that's great".

At the loft, Izzy is dealing with her new responsibilites as writer of QN, and - basically - is trying to get Leo and Doug to do her homework for her. The two men are lazing around, trying to read, while Izzy worries about what she will write. Aha! She will write about the irony that Disney's "Tomorrowland" is already obsolete. No, Doug says, that's already been covered. Doug is sans goatee this time. Izzy worries that she can't fill her dad's shoes.

At Epicenter, Izzy and Karen are discussing their past experiences with their dad. Once, Karen redid the masthead, but dad didn't like it and overrode her design, making her feel crappy. "Don't worry", Izzy says, "there are two of us now - we can take him".

Suddenly, we are in a University classroom where a young professor (not Prof Levinson, another one) is teaching a psychology class. I immediately recogzined the professor as the likabke actir who played the protagonist's bro in the 1983 movie Christine. I'm sure he's done other things since then, but that's where I know him from. I was glad to see that he's getting some work again. Jen arrives, and calls Eve out of class, which miffs the professor. "I guess we'll just wait".

Outside, Jen complains that while her dad has picked out hundreds of photographers to work on the magazine, he's never asked her to do any photography work for the magazine. Eve has to get back to class, she has oral exams coming up soon.

At home in the master bedroom, Eve is practicing her speech, where she rehearses something about attachment theory, and how this affects the securely and insecurely attached child. Izzy walks in, and is all awkwardly wondering if last night mom heard her say that about her, about dying if Izzy turned out like her mom. Mom denies it, soothingly but firmly. She immediately mentions that she has to finish her report. Izzy ineffectively meanders around the same topic, and says that she just wants to tell her mom that she's the coolest person she's ever met. Eve is sooo effective in this scene, with just a look or two, she notices / forgives / and firmly and self-assuredly does not display the fact that she knows her daughter is bulls***ing her. "Thanks for the kind words, but I have to finish my report."

Looking over with Izzy the page that Karen has put together, David is all doubtful about whether he likes it. He remembers how he once asked her to redesign the masthead, but the font she used was too small to shrink and be readable, so he had to redo it, and it didn't work out. You can't talk to her about it, she is just too sensitive. They could redesign it, or they can just throw it out and redo it, which would take half the time . . . Izzy asks, "You wouldn't want to be the one to discuss that with her, would you dad?"

Later, Karen and Izzy are discussing the very same design which Izzy is nervously eyeing. Karen says that "It's brilliant, we'll have to talk to fight dad on it."  Izzy says that she's uncomfortable with it, it's not even close to what we discussed, and it competes with the text. Karen gets angry, "Oh, so now you are speaking for the whole magazine, now I work for you, you are rejecting it because it competes with your text?"

At the loft, while Leo patiently minds his own business and reviews the magazine, Izzy is on the phone with (presumably) Eve, who is apparently yelling at Izzy for firing Karen. Izzy yells into the phone, "I did not fire Karen! Listen to me! . . ." Turning to Leo, she says, "she hung up on me". Leo looks up from the magazine, and says that he loves what Karen did with it. Izzy looks disappointed. Leo asks a very sensible question, "You gave Karen specific suggestions, right?" Izzy says, "Couldn't, Karen is too sensitive". Leo perceptively hits the bullseye by asking, "Isn't that your dad's interpretation?" (Bingo!!!!) Izzy answers with the logically devastating answer that "Karen is too sensitive and everyone in my family knows it".

At the University, in a beautiful arched walkway, Eve catches up to her professor, whom we learn is named Sinclair. Eve asks for feedback, and Professor Sinclair has to give her the news that she thinks her work is disorganized. She is a lovely lady, but she walks out of class, doesn't show up for evening seminars. "Don't devalue the work that volunteers do". He's telling Eve to be a blood bank receptionist or something. Eve lets him know that she knows what she's doing, and that she'll stick it out.

At the office, David is telling Izzy how he read Izzy's article on the torch being passed, and how it choked him up. Izzy is pleased to no end.

Late at night, still at the office, Eve walks into David's office and wants to talk about her upsetting experience with Professor Sinclair. David is distracted, and looks up to say, "Whaaa?" He has been working very late on "editing" Izzy's Quake Notes artivle. Eve, even more upset now, walks out and David follows.

With great dignity, she lets him have it: "You didn't even like professor Levinson! He intimidated you! I helped you get this magazine off the ground, and I stood in rainy street corners with you passing out this little stapled magazine that we were amazed that anyone read! And at the time of your greatest recognition I didn't even come to mind, and there is nothing you can do or say that can change that!" David has nothing to say, and just looks defeated.

At the Epicenter parking lot, a co-worker gushily congratulates Izzy on her QN article. Izzy is flattered, and grateful. He loved the part about the award banquet, and immediately Izzy looks puzzled. Just what did dad's "editing" do to her article, you can read that question on her face. He shows her a copy of the article, and she recognizes it's not hers. The black lady who was supposed to get QN comes up to Izzy and gracefully gushes, too, saying "You are awesome".

The next scene, of course, is of Izzy storming into her dad's office. "You rewrote every word of my article!!!" And you are using Karen's design, you are humiliating me in front of everyone. At least you could have told me this was no good.

At home, Izzy walks in on Karen making tea. Tells her that dad will use her design, sorry. Karen is subdued, but tries to be reassuring to Izzy. (This is the kind of reason why on the list we have been saying that Karen is so emotionally attractive!) Izzy asks, "You don't feel like you're competing with me, do you?" A clever answer from Karen ensues, where Karen says, "No, I gave up competing with you because you're more . . . you're more . . . you're just more." Izzy, of course, takes this as a compliment and condescendingly asks, "Wow, you don't go around feeling like this all the time, do you?". With a steady eye, Karen answers, "Oh, no . . . not at all . . ."

At the University, Izzy meets her mom, who was waiting for her. Eve tells her daughter that she had thought it would be a good idea if she sat in on class with her, but maybe it's not such a good idea, sorry you drove all this way. Eve is nice, and gently about it, and it's hard to tell if Eve's change of mind is because of what Prof. Sinclair said, or because of what Eve overheard Izzy say. They are about to part, and almost do, when Eve comes back and says, "I made a choice not to listen to others, but to myself. I chose to take care of you, I know it looks like nothing but I'm proud of it, and I just want you to live your life with all your heart". It's a wonderful speech, and if I may say so, it should humble Izzy, at least a little, to hear that.

At the office, Izzy tells David that she can't be him, she can only be herself, she can't do QN. David, secretly relieved, very discreetly says, "We'll miss you". Izzy says, "Oh, no, I'm not quitting, I'm just going to write my own articles from now on. Fixing him with a piercing glare, she asks, "How would it look if, after that great article with my name on it that just came out, you fired me?" David stares at her with a ghastly mix of appreciation and surprise, and quietly says, "That's blackmail. You're good, that's something I would do." Recognizing that she has won, Izzy confidently walks out, with the exit line, "Wait til you see my ideas for next month".

At home, Eve picks up the latest Epicenter and starts to read QN, the one that Izzy supposedly wrote but which was actually penned by David. It reads, "To Eve Lukens, who helped me distribute this incendiary pamphlet until she was dragged off by the cops, and who after being released came back to do it again at a different corner; strong, fearless, without her this magazine would have disappeared" . . .

David arrives, and says, "Hi . . . " Eve says "Hey . . ." David breaks down and tells her that the only thing he thinks about is, "What will Eve think of this? I have your voice inside of me, it makes me a better writer, a better man, there is nobody kinder than you, it terrifies me to think how much I need you, it terrifies me".

Eve quietly replies, "I need you, too".

1-11 Silent Night--12/21/1996
We're at the Lukenses', and virtually the whole family is running around the kitchen cooking. Eve's feelings are a little entangled with this meal, and she needs a little support. Allan and Karen bustle in throught the door with the tree. My hope was that we would suddenly see all of the dead tree's relatives amble in, walking on their roots, screaming for revenge, and drag Allan down to hell kicking and screaming. But, oh well, that didn't happen. : )

They all gather around the tree, deciding where to place it and whether it's big enough. Eve apparently is the annual (anal?) tree judge because Karen does a sportscaster-like play-by-play as Eve walks around and approves/disapproves of certain features of the tree. She decides it's too small, and wouldn't Izzy like to take it home because it's just the right size for the loft? Izzy is caught, trying to be polite about the fact that she has a Jewish boyfriend.

Allan, that wizened and sensitive Judaica expert, says that "lots of Jewish families grow up celebrating Christmas". Spiraling downwards into obligatory politeness, they ask if Izzy wouldn't like to invite Leo over for Christmas. David is passive/aggressively rude about the invitation, with sort of a "yeah, I guess" attitude.

Eve asks if she should serve some of the preserves she made, and in a chorus everyone shouts, "No!"

At the Roths', Karen is talking to Barry, their dad, and she seems to be getting the bad news that Barry won't be coming home from Ohio for Christmas. (The gentle reader will remember that Barry moved to Ohio to take the job that held the chance of a lifetime, paying $60,000 a year as a tire sales manager)

Rhonda passes the phone to Jake, who clearly misses and needs his dad so badly, and who tries so hard to hide it. He speaks briefly, and then on to Grandpa who takes the phone with great concern, and speaks briefly to Barry before we leave that scene.

At the loft, Rhonda is discussing with Leo their father's absence. Leo makes the sarcastic comment that they could always use the "blow-up dad". Downstairs, Izzy, Karen, and Allan trudge in with the Christmas tree. Izzy goes upstairs to prepare - ahem - I mean, discuss it with Leo first. She walks in on Leo and Rhonda, and tries to coyly ask how Leo feels about Christmas trees. Because, you know, Karen and Allan - and the tree - are downstairs. Rhonda makes an aside to herself, "Good thing Grandma's dead". Izzy asks if it's ok about the tree and Rhonda tells her exactly how she feels; she says "Jews celebrating Christmas . . . it's like finishing Hitler's work for him". Leo looks shocked, but Rhonda's not having any of it, telling him "Honestly, Leo!" Izzy prudently goes off to get a beer.

A wonderful scene ensues, where they are making pleasant conversation about how wonderful this all is with Izzy in the kitchen, while the two siblings have a very honest conversation. Wonderful interplay! For one, Leo asks if the Hitler comment wasn't a little overboard. Izzy comes back, and it's decided that they will go to the party.

Next, Leo and my beloved Doug are walking around the mall. Doug is giving him all the dirt on how the goys are going to treat him. They will wish him a Merry Christmas, and then freeze up, wondering if that was proper. He then does his best Don Corlione and tells him that he's being led "into the bosom of the family".

We then cut away to a scene we don't at first understand. It's a far-off shot of a bus stopping at a busy, sunny Los Angeles intersection in a low-rise commercial neighborhood. A few people get on, and we spot the unmistakable figure of grandpa Hal ambling off the bus. What could he be doing there? He goes up to a brightly-painted motel room door. He knocks . . . and the door is opened by Barry!

Once inside, it's clear. Hal is asking "Didn't you talk to them! Imagine, firing you at Christmas! I mean, I know we're Jews, but still . . .", which I thought was a delicious summary of part of what happens in this episode.

Barry explains that his ideas were seen as too contrary, but he still likes them. For example, look at this cute mail-away little keychain in the exact shape of a miniature tire. It's real tire rubber! Hal brings him down to earth, and asks him not to say anything to the kids.

Next, we get another wonderful visual!! I loved this one. We see a beautiful room, with french windows, I think. We overhear Eve and Izzy talking, and expect them to walk in at any moment but instead, we see their huge heads looking into the room. We realize we'd been looking at a room in an intricate dollhouse.

Izzy mentions that she's invited his entire family, and when Eve looks stricken, makes the statement that she can "still take it back" (!!) Eve assures her that it's OK, which of course is just Eve covering up. Eve says that she's always been curious about his family anyway, and wants to meet them. "Just . . . let me tell your father".

Meanwhile, the parallel scene is going on at the Roths'. Leo is painfully telling them all (except for dad Barry, whom they don't know about yet) that they are headed for the Lukenses' for Christmas. Rhonda thinks that Leo is secretly hoping they won't accept, and says, "He is so ashamed of us! I think we should all go". Jake pops in with "Well, David already invited me", which surprises everyone, for a delicious moment.

They are deciding who will gift whom, and some of the pairings are so funny. I think Rhonda gets Jen, and Rhonda asks if she isn't the young slutty one. A half-second of Jake defending her, "She's not slutty..." (No, Jake, but she sure is sexy! : ) Someone disgustedly asks if Izzy made up this list. I believe it's grandpa Hal who interjects that they shouldn't dismiss the possibility of Barry being there.

At the Lukenses', everyone is gathered around David and the Christmas tree he is decorating. David graciously asks if "these people" really want to come. They are distributing Roth family members among themselves as "secret Santa" subjects, too. Leo comes up in the conversation, and David changes the subject. Izzy calls him on it. The issue isn't really resolved, and Jen whispers to Izzy to tell Leo to get his family out of the country.

Back at the Roth's, Jake is being told by his dad that dad can't come. Leo takes over the phone, and in the guise of a normal conversation, tells Barry that it's OK, because David Lukens has sort of become a father figure to Jake. This prompts Hal to jump in, take the phone, tell Barry that Leo will call back, and lecture Leo on how he should never talk to his own dad like that. Telling him that Jake has a new father figure! In the meantime, Jake has left.

There is a wonderful, soulful rendition of "Silent Night" which is sung by street performers in a night scene through which Barry walks thoughtfully.

Back in the loft's bathroom, Leo and Izzy are discussing mistletoe. If it's up to Jen, there will be mistletoe every two feet. Leo is upset because he keeps seeing Jake's face as Leo handed him the phone with the news that dad wasn't coming. Doug comes in, and when it becomes clear that all the gifts are to be opened right in front of everyone, there is some reluctance to let that happen. Hmmm, I wonder what's in that box? :) Izzy discusses Christmas with him, and invites him to the Lukenses. At first, Doug is reluctant but when Izzy mentions gifts for everyone, Doug charmingly pipes up and says, "Oh! Let me get my Santa suit!" : )

We fade to the Lukenses, where everyone is running around nervously because the Roths are coming. Eve is anally obessing over how the gifts are distributed around the tree, they're too bunched up. She's told it's ok, Martha Stewart is not coming tonight.

The Roths arrive, and Hal walks in, admires the house - and with that wonderful sense of understatement I've learned to expect from this actor's palette, he says, "Well! . . . Now, this is what I call Christmas". Hal is presented to Eve's mother, who comes down the staircase, stiff as a block of ice, with a look that says, "Zo, zis is ze Jew". She shakes his hand but, you know, I thought she was going to do the Heil Hitler salute.

There's a quick scene of the loftmates at a convenience store, picking up stuff for the party and talking about how they hope they get there before the other Roths do. They get to the Lukenses', and Doug of course introduces himself by saying, "My pleasure, my honor". Eve is sorry, but her dad couldn't make it.

People mingle around, and we catch a glimpse of Hal telling Eve's mother, "Well, you know, he was a Jew". Doug is flirting with Karen again, asking which of those stockings is hers. "That one". Oh, well, how lovely, of course. Which one is Allan's? "This one" Oh! Well! My, well, you know, we should report him to the proper authorities.

There is a Christmas toast, and David gives a speech. While this is happening, we see Barry come to the door, peek through the window. He has a small box in his arms, and he hesitates . . . and then begins to walk away. However, Eve spots him and asks him to come in.

He does, and walks up to David and says "You're David, the big boss, the one who's taken Jake under his wing". Barry opens the box, and shows everyone the little tire keychains. It's all starting to get embarrassing. Grandpa tries to interrupt, but we are beginning to get a sense of how tanked up Barry is.

He starts to yell at David. Do you know Jake's favorite flavor of ice cream? Of course you don't. You know why? Because you weren't there when I was going to the store to get him ice cream when Jake was sick, and Jake would yell out, "Strawberry". I WANT TO KNOW WHAT YOU CAN DO WITH YOUR WING! What gives you that right? David answers, "Because I feel sorry for them". Leo is incredulous at this.

After we come back from commercial, everyone is rushing around looking for Barry. Eve is left at the Lukenses, waiting by the phone in case he calls.

He's not at the apartment, and Allan offers the comment that he doesn't fit the profile for a suicide. David starts to say something conciliatory, but Leo yells at him to not even say anything, because Leo knows David doesn't mean it.

Leo and Izzy are in the car, driving around looking for Barry. Izzy is glad that scene happened because things that needed to come out, came out. Leo is afraid that David won't like him anymore, but Izzy reassures him that David will like Leo more.

Other Roths and Lukenses arrive at the Roth's apartment, but no Barry.

Doug and Rhonda are driving around, too. Rhonda pulls out the gift that Barry left them, and with horror she realizes that it's his 10,000 severance check, signed over to the children. Uh-ohhhh.

Izzy and Leo rush into his motel room, but he's not there either.

Eve is still sitting by the phone when . . . Barry returns. Eve welcomes him. Barry apologizes, and Eve is very sweet to him. She talkes him out to the backyard, sits him down comfortably and gives him the famous preserves that she's been trying to feed everyone throughout the whole episode. Barry tells her that he lost his job, and Eve replies that his kids know, they figured it out.

At the Roths', Leo is on the phone and he's asked to get off in case someone wants to call in. Eve walks in, saying "We tried to call but the phone was busy". Jake rushes over, and gives him a tender and heartfelt hug. I love Jake for then saying to Barry, "Screw that job!" Rhonda is next, and she softly says, "Daddy..."

Barry apologizes, saying "If I've upset anyone, and I'm sure I have (gestures towards David, who gestures forgivingly) I'm sorry".

Fade to the Lukens daughters singing "Silent night". They harmonize beautifully, I hope those are the real actresses' voices. This scene comes to the very brink of maudlin, but is rescued as it nearly topples over the edge by frequent cutaways to the other people mingling, and being real with each other, this time.

Someone sets down the gift lava lamp next to the singing women. Barry serves coffee to David. Leo says to his dad, "You never make it easy". People are talking about what teams they're fans of, and maybe they should go to a game together.

Leo pulls Izzy over to an empty corner and tells her that he's got her gift. "What?" "Them", he says gesturing towards his family. "Them, in all their glory". They contemplate the two families, together, and smile with genuine love. "Thanks, Leo . . . Likewise. . . ." Fade to black.

1-12 New Years--01/04/1997
As the ep opens, Leo and Izzy are nuzzling each other on a chaise longue on the big, white, flower-pot covered roof of their building. They're discussing their upcoming New Year's party, and how this will be their first New Year's together. Izzy seems suddenly inspired, "Let's put raspberries in the champagne!" Leo loves how she does all of these creative little things.

As they start to neck some more, we hear a woman's voice from below. They both frown at the interruption, and they both ask, "Rhonda?"

Rhonda has come to see them, and leads them dows the stairs to their loft. She's talking about an ad she's got circled, which says, "Self-made man seeks self-made woman". The guy sounds great, he even has a golden retriever. Rhonda's friend Ruthie answered the ad, which seems to them a very cold way to meet someone. Ruthie and friend get invited to the party at the loft, along with Rhonda who doesn't have a date and has rejected every woman she's dated since she was with Sylvia.

Doug comes in from his bedroom, dressing, tucking his shirt into his pants. He is highly upset, in that indirect manner of his. It seems he called Tammy, but she has gotten married and is now in Hawaii with some guy she met at a bar a couple of months before. While the others watch in aghast sympathy, he takes a chicken leg out of the refrigerator, starts to bite into it, then just throws it in the general vecinity of the trash. He'll have to come to the party alone...

The next scene opens very suddenly, with a close up of some clothes in a closet...which Izzy opens very quickly, sticks her head in through the gap, and says, "Marcy's a lesbian. I know it". She's talking to Leo, who asks how Izzy is so sure. Well, obviously she's a lesbian because she has a poster from the gay and lesbian film festival in her office, she was upset when her female roommate moved out. Two and two together, gotta be a lesbian.

Leo asks her to quit picking lesbians at random for his sister, which Izzy denies. Besides, trust her, she's very good at setting people up.

Next scene, it's Izzy and Marcy at the roach coach outside their office

Marcy - So, you're trying to set me up with a woman?
Izzy - Noooooooo, no, of course not.

Turns out Marcy is straight, but isn't into parading their boyfriends through the office, a little dig which Izzy totally misses.

Marcy wonders whether Izzy still wants her to come, since now she won't be the setup-ee for Rhonda, but Izzy mentions Doug and reassures Marcy in a very, ahem, sincere voice that she still is invited to the party.

Next, we see Izzy and Karen on the rooftop. Karen is surprised that Izzy was going to set up Doug with Marcy, since Doug is with Tammy. No, Izzy says, Tammy ran off with some guy and is now in Hawaii. We can see Karen's gears turning...so, Doug will be there. Good, she will at least have someone to hang out with.

Izzy pointedly remarks that she could hang out with Alan, her husband, but it turns out that Alan is in New York. After Izzy's vacillating remarks, Karen asks if Izzy is disinviting her, which Izzy reassures Karen is definitely not true.

Next, we see Bailey (the worthless brother's friend) and Jake walking uphill on some dirt path next to a cyclone fence, all of which is overhung by some trees. Not your typical suburbian setting. Bailey is entreating, encouraging, and cajoling Jake into being brave and making a move on Jen at the party. She'll be at the right point of the rebounding process. Jake is shy because "She hates me because I crashed her dad's car", and a million other reasons. Bailey continues to try to encourage Jake by saying, "Look, if you don't go for her then I will".

Next, we see Jen and Izzy, apparently at the Lukens kitchen. Jen seems to have a lot of pent-up sexual energy, after the breakup with Dean, the head-banging poet. Izzy is doubtful, saying that Jen is on the rebound, and in denial. Jen says that she'll be glad for the party, she needs one, she will "Release all her energy!" Jen slyly asks if Leo will, you know, bring "anyone from work". (Anyone who mumbles a lot, flirts imperceptibly, has curly hair and is named Jake, we are given to suppose : )

Next, Leo and his boss Julia the architect are at the entrance to their building, receiving a huge gift basket of fruit. Leo misreads the card, Passion, from some guy in Caracas. It turns out that it's Pasion, a tropical fruit. Leo teases Julia a little over this, and asks about her plans for new year's. "You'll be busy, right?" Not the most inviting invitation. Julia was just going to spend it at home, and Leo doesn't see a way out of it, so he hesitatingly invites her to the party, because Izzy really wants her to come.

Leo and Izzy are washing dishes at the loft, and Izzy is very upset. She's just fine with his inviting Julia. Leo makes the brilliant tactical move of saying, "But I thought that you were over this whole Julia thing". If I were Leo, I would have ducked right after saying that. :) Izzy asks, "What Julia thing!" (And she was telling Jen that Jen was in denial?) Leo feels that things are spiraling out of control, and mumbles something about Izzy trying to make everyone happy. She mentions that she has set up Julia with Doug. Leo gives up, and and moves off.

Karen arrives at the loft, which is all dark except for a million pinpoints of tiny white lights around the doorframes and looks really beautiful. Karen wows over this, and walks all the way into the apartment looking for Leo and Izzy, and Doug comes out to greet her. The electricity is palpable, and of course it all just makes Karen look so beautiful and girlishly flirtatious, yet womanly - I think any man can understand how Doug feels! He flirts with her in that way of his, and she laughs and plays with a candle flame by passing her finger playfully back and forth a few times - an apt metaphor for playing with fire in the form of a phallic object.

Doug asks, you don't think Isabel is setting us up, do you? which takes Karen aback a little. Doug says, no of course not, you don't find the idea offensive, do you? Nobody's setting us up because, I believe, you're married. Yes, Karen asserts, she's married. Well, then, Doug says, don't be so sensitive, a very humorous thing to say.

Julia arrives, and she has brought the Pasion fruit, and greets Karen with a big hug. People begin to mingle, and Izzy springs her big idea of the raspberries in the Champagne, but no one takes her up on it. Rhonda shows, and eagerly asks Izzy where Marcy is. Izzy glances at Marcy, and is sorry that she forgot to mention it, but it turns out that Marcy "isn't free". Of course, at that moment, Marcy comes over to the both of them and eagerly asks where he is. Rhonda catches on, and looks at Izzy sharply, saying "You have been a busy girl!" Izzy says something about Doug, and Rhonda asks with great surprise, "You set her up with Doug?!" Marcy wants to know what's wrong with Doug, but they make some excuse.

There is a commotion, and everyone rushes over to another part of the loft because Julia is going to teach them to salsa! Everyone is excited about this, except Izzy. "Salsa! . . ."

We spend several minutes milling around the increasingly lively party, as the salsa music sinks into the atmosphere and warms everyone up. People mill around, dance, and are having a great time. Doug comes up to Karen and makes noises about dancing, but Karen seems genuinely shy. Doug looks sad and rejected by this, clinks Karen's glass, says "OK, so you don't want to dance with me", and walks off, disappointed.

More people spill off the elevator, including Tough Guy!!! I love him! Jen dances with him as he comes out. They all spill out, leaving a very still, very angry-looking guy wearing a bathrobe, doing a slow burn in the back of the elevator. Jen dances into the elevator, and dances with him. He seems upset about the loud salsa music, and he responds to Jen by saying, "Yes, I live here, I live downstairs, I'm a cop and in a couple of hours I have to go off and start protecting people so, do you mind?!"

Leo and Izzy are dancing, and Izzy compliments Leo on his dancing. Leo engagingly answers that he's not so good, all you have to do is watch Julia and do what she does. Izzy gets defensive, "AHA, so you're watching Julia!" She asks him why he's not having Champagne with raspberries, her big idea. You know, this reminds me of how no one would want to eat any of Eve's weird preserves.

Leo answers that he doesn't want to mix the passion fruit drink with Champagne, because then he'd be totally out. Izzy is insanely jealous that Julia's passion fruit drink and salsa music are such hits of the party. "It's like it's Julia's party, we were to have a sweet, romantic evening and it's turned into a drunken orgy, we were supposed to have Champagne with raspberries, not that love potion that Julia brought!" She and Leo walk out of the room where they were having the fight, and suddenly everything goes into slow motion.

Ruth Anne - Ruthie - has arrived, with her date from the newspaper ad, the "self-made man", who turns out to be none other than Everett! Izzy is amazed, in slow motion, and rushes over to greet him, while Leo slows down behind her, and stares forlornly at the scene before his eyes, with a look that says, "I've just lost her . . ."

Izzy smiles, saying how she remembers that last New Year's they spent it at Big Bear. Ruthie makes a remark, "What a coincidence", meaning that she and Everett probably just spent some time there. Yes, Everett says, it's when I showed you about drinking Champagne and raspberries. . . . and it's Leo's turn to say, "What a coincidence"

So, Ruthie chirpily asks, how do you all know each other. Lots of nervous smiles, "Well, we're all old friends".

Everett sincerely offers to leave, and Leo sincerely says, "Well, if you'd be more comfortable...", and Everett reality-checks by asking "Well, if you want me to leave -" which Izzy charmingly interrupts with, "No, he doesn't!"

Izzy and Leo fight in a phone booth in the loft, Leo saying well, I can understand if you still have feelings for him, you spent 7 years with him and that's a lot of Champagne and raspberries!

By this time, the party has escalated to lambada music, and everyone (except the main characters :) seem to be generally having a great time.

Marcy walks up and introduces herself to Doug, who is apparently still sad over Karen's rejection of his offer to dance, because he just mentions his name to Marcy, and walks off.

On the roof, Bailey is still pushing the reluctant Jake towards Jen, who seems to be at the perfect time to be approached. The sleepy downstairs cop beats Jake to it, though, and begins complaining again.

Everett and Leo are chatting, and Everett spots Julia from far away, and asks Leo in wonderment, "Who's that?" By now the cop is a little tipsy and Jen is consoling him, and putting her head on his shoulder.

Doug is sitting by himself in a corner of the roof, and Karen walks up to chat him up, getting a chair as she comes. She says, "Sorry about before, I'm a terrible dancer.

Doug talks about how he misses Tammy, but (being Mr. Oblique Speech) they should have broken up long ago, "You know how sometimes you stick with someone even though you no longer have anyhing in common with them, and how they dump you, since they know you well, you wonder if they're on to something".

Karen jumps on that, reassuring Doug that there' absolutely nothing wrong with him. In one of the most heartfelt romantic scenes in the series, Doug looks up at Karen and asks, "Do you know that you're in a museum? I mean, there's this painting, and it's this big, of this woman with wild hair and big eyes and a tiny mouth, and she's supposed to be some sort of crazy angel or something". Karen's face tries to hide that she feels the impact of Doug's words.

Doug continues, "She looks like you except . . . her hair is more like . . . " and he reaches over and lovingly rearranges a few strands of Karen's hair. (At this point, I thought I was going to faint!) Karen can't help herself anymore, and makes a motion as if to kiss Doug's hand, which he reluctantly but very quickly withdraws.

We switch to Jen and the cop, who is now fairly drunk, and bitterly complaining to Jen about how his wife left him because of his job. Bailey and Jake are observing this, and Bailey says "Forget it, he bagged her, let's go get a cigar". (Someone has brought excellent Cuban cigars to the party).

Izzy and Everett are talking about how happy Everett looks, and about how he is now learning celestial navigation, which he always wanted to do. Leo and Silvia are sharing a good cigar. Karen and Marcy are sitting on stairs on the roof, depressed about their lack of mates. "I wouldn't have rejected you", Karen says. Izzy and Everett are talking about how much he is over her. Even though Everett "never thought that he would".

The countdown starts, 10, 9, 8 . . . Doug and Karen are near each other, and we are screaming for them to kiss, but they don't.

Everett, Julia, Leo and Izzy are downstairs chatting, and when Julia mentions Caracas (Venezuela), she and Everett switch to Spanish. It turns out that Everett spent some time in Julia's native Caracas because his dad was with the CIA. "Ah, so you know Caracas! Want to go up on the roof?", and they go. Izzy remarks on how they hit it off.

In the ensuing argument, Leo almost admits that he is jealous of Everett over Julia, but he finds it incredible that someone like her would find Everett attractive. Izzy points out that this is insulting to both Everett and herself, which is true.

On the roof, both Everett and Julia discuss how they both seem sad. Julia pensively walks off, leaving Everett by himself. Leo comes to the roof, and mistakes Everett for Doug, and calls out to him, "Hey, Dougie!" Everett turns around, and Leo excuses himself and almost leaves. Everett calls him back, saying "You don't have to avoid me".

They talk, about how happy and over Izzy Everett is. Except, he asks, does she ever mention him? Leo quietly says, No. Everett says, "That's ok . . . I still have my dog . . ."

Jen walks up to Bailey and Jake. Bailey says he thought she was with the dude in the bathrobe, but Jen disappointedly replies that he's gone off to talk to his wife. Jen starts to flirt with Jake about how she loves his beard, and how it makes him look 20!

Karen walks into the loft's bathroom, looking preoccupied, and at that moment Doug walks out of one of the stalls. Doug doesn't wash his hands, as is often his custom, and they warily eye each other on the mirror . . . and Doug walks out. Karen fondles the spigot, another phallic metaphor, and toughtfully looks at herself in the mirror.

Izzy and Julia are talking, and Julia acknowledges and apologizes for taking over Izzy's party. She's sorry, she just didn't want the fruit to go to waste. She explains that the person who sent the fruit was her brother's boyfriend in Caracas. Luis, her brother, died of AIDS, and she was so distraught that she thought the party would help, which it seemed to. She sincerely thanks Izzy, because he said that it was her idea that Julia come. Izzy just smiles up at her.

Jen is caressing Jake's goatee! She says thanks, she just wanted to feel what it was like. "No problem...any time." You see, Jen explains, it reminds her of someone she knew who was trying to get a goatee growing. Jake is disappointed, but hides it.

Leo and Everett come down from the roof, and meet Izzy and Julia, who is on her way out. The loft is now empty, and Everett looks around for his date . . . who's left without him. Since Julia was just leaving, he leaves with her.

Izzy spontaneously says "I didn't have feelings for him". However, Leo would understand it if she did. Their backs to a door, they both slowly slide to the floor, exhausted.

Leo says that last year at this time, he was at Rhonda's and didn't know Izzy existed; two years ago his mom was alive. He wants things to stay exactly as they are now. Izzy looks away and absent-mindedly but with displeasure says slowly, "Yeah, wouldn't that be great".

"What did you and Everett talk about?", Leo wants to know. "What did you and Everett talk about?", she shoots back. The soft jazz background music swells, and she lays her head on his shoulder, tired, both looking off into space.

1-13 The Day The Earth Moved--01/11/1997
As we look down on the bed, Leo's head flops down onto it, a look of ardent desire on it. Izzy is on top of him, and they are both writhing deliciously. There is a rock-music background, and they are staring into each other's eyes and Leo is breathlessly whispering excited sweet little things. "That was so different . . . never thought that . . .I feel like I'm melting . . . I want . . . I want . . ."

Doug, in the next room, is sitting up on his bed and trying to read, but looking very perturbed at the noise coming from the next room. We see things in Leo and Izzy's bedroom shaking, more, and more, as they get even more excited, and the shaking grows in intensity . . . until plaster starts falling off the wall, things drop and crash to the floor, the whole apartment shakes, and Doug takes cover under his sheets to protect himself from another California earthquake.

Leo and Izzy keep going, barely noticing the quake, and Izzy closes her eyes and comes as extravagantly as network standards and practices would allow.

The next scene starts with a shot of a big long fire hose in its glass case, which made me smile. Pan over to Izzy and Leo, both now dressed but still kissing each other insanely as they walk towards the door. They see the crack on the wall, and Leo asks, "Did we do that?" Izzy thinks so, and seems serious about it. She does, however, have a friend who is a seismic expert and checks out buildings for safety. Izzy has to leave for work, but Leo regrets letting her go.

Doug and Leo are hanging out after she's left, and Doug is asking about the damned good sex that was going on last night. Doug is full of his oblique curiosity, but Leo feels a little different this time - this time, it was sacred, he didn't know such a thing could exist, so he doesn't want the usual locker-room talk with Doug. Doug seems dubious, but gives an discontented "ok . . ."

Which, of course, makes Leo turn around and start spilling the beans. Doug makes lots of jokes about how their sex was in the news, because they are so public and loud about it. It was so incredibly good. Isn't Doug going to that Clippers game tonight? No, that's tomorrow night, but if Leo thinks it would be better, and would like him to be out that night . . . Well, only if Doug already has plans . . .

Karen and Iz are folding laundry at the Lukens estate. Like Doug, Karen is full of curiosity about whatever Izzy amd :Leo did last night that are making Izzy so happy that day. Unlike Doug's, her curiosity is full of frustrated urgency. What in the world did they do that made it so great? What is their secret trick? Will Isabel quit being so coy and please tell! They're talking about something big, right? Was an orgasm involved?

Isabel says matter-of-factly that "Oh, and orgasm is always involved". Poor Karen quietly says "Really?" So, will Izzy share what their trick is, because she and Alan have tried everything . . .they have books and stuff, and nothing works. Izzy breaks down and tells her that it was magical, it was like a trap door opened and anything was possible!

Rhonda is at a restaurant, out on a date with a non-stop windbag who won't talks a million miles a minute about women tennis players, and every detail of their lives, and how she is such a fan of Martina Navratilova, her muscles, etcetera. Rhonda's close up shows that she can only look totally lost and bewildered and like she wants to be anywhere, including with a man, anywhere but here.

Later, when Rhonda is working as a bartender at what looks like the nice restaurant in some semi-fancy hotel, Doug comes up to the bar and visits with her. He would be at the apartment, except he's not supposed to be there because they are repeating their incredible night of sex. Rhonda says that it's ok if they are happy but do they have to make everyone miserable, presumably by parading their great sex life in front of everyone? Doug agrees, that kind of sex can't be sustained two nights in a row, they are probably finding that out about now, and are probably all suicidal.

Cut to the bedroom, with Leo and Izzy going totally animal on each other. (Again, as animal as a cowardly network would allow). A long scene of the two of them twirling around a little, looking into each other's faces, the whole sexy romantic thing.

The next morning, Doug comes out of the bedroom towards Leo and wonders how it was last night. Leo tells him it was great again!

Next, we get a back-and-forth sequence of Leo at the loft telling Doug, and Izzy at work telling Karen, what happened last night.

Leo: I talked a lot again last night . . .
Doug: Tell! Unless it's too embarassing or something.
Leo: I might have asked her to marry me . . .]

Izzy: But he asked me only in the throes of passion
Karen: So, in the throes of passion, did you say yes?!?!

Doug: Did she say yes?
Leo: I'm not sure if she heard me

Karen: So, you're not treating it as a proposal?
Izzy: No . . .

Doug: (Bouncing off the walls): Ohmygod! You have to back out of it, tell her you were speaking in tongues, you were a man possessed, tell her anything!
Leo: Under Doug's pressure strays into making up something to appease him, and says something about not worrying, how they haven't decided to do anything, in fact, they're not going to get married

Later, the phone rings at the loft and it appears that Leo is gone. Doug answers it, and it's Karen calling from the office. Is Isabel there at the loft? The camera refocuses on Isabel, working away a few feet from Karen.

She tells Doug that she wants to return Isabel's sweater to the loft, and Doug is very quick to take her up on it. Yes, sure, come by and drop off the sweater, he's just opened a can of raviolios, please, drop by. And so, she comes. She hands him the sweater, and there are a few uncomfortable minutes as Doug offers her a bunch of things to eat that she declines, and Doug starts joking about offering her very fine food.

And so, it comes out that Karen has heard of their sexual breakthrough the past couple of nights. Ah! Doug says, "You know about it, so you do watch CNN", which makes Karen laugh. She even knows about the marriage proposal. Ah, so Izzy did hear Leo say it. Hmmm, was Leo thinking that Iz didn't hear it? Well, he was holding on to that possibility, Doug says. Besides, he adds, he doesn't pretend to understand matters of the heart anymore. Karen gets serious. Doesn't he? Well, Doug only tells people about that on a need-to-know basis. Karen quietly says, "I need to know . . . :" Doug stammers a little.

Back at Rhonda's bartending gig, Doug is complaining about how he became this submissive lapdog to Karen, and about how wrong this all is. Rhonda agrees, characteristically telling him with that patented lack of reserver that, yeah, Karen is married. Rhonda mentions that she has a date, and Doug flirts very appealingly with Rhonda. What about me? I thought we were going to get heavily involved, what about the mud-wrestling we were going to do? Rhonda takes this in good spirits.

Just then, Rhonda's date shows up. She's a pretty blonde who soon starts asking where she knows Rhonda from, because she looks very, very familiar. It's clear that Rhonda doesn't know this woman from Eve, but the bizarre woman persists. From the baby shower last week? From the "hiking dykes"? From Barbara Elliott's party? Doug takes the opportunity to leave. "Who was that?" the woman wants to know. That was Doug. Oh, really, because he looks very familiar . . .

At the loft, Izzy's seismic friend Suzanne is evaluating the apartment. She wouldn't live there. Doug shows up and comes up to Rhonda, teasingly saying "Gee, you look very familiar to me". Rhonda grimaces, laughs, and explains that this is from the date she just escaped, it was terrible, this woman was such a nutcase. Everyone in the room, Izzy, Leo, Doug, and most importantly, Suzanne, are clear that this was a lesbian date.

Rhonda doesn't want to even think about earthquakes, telling Suzanne that "denial is very important to me, it's my essence." Doug jokes that lesbian-type people are very sensitive to earthquakes, studies have been done. So, is the loft safe? No, it will be a pile of bricks after the next quake, 100% guaranteed.

Cut to Leo and Izzy walking the street at night. She brings up what he said, his proposal of marriage during the sex. Was it just a slip of the tongue. He vacillates for a second, then - no, he wants to say it, he's serious. She's overjoyed, but then pulls back a little when he does, and they leave it at "it's something we're going to think about".

In bed, with the lights off, they are no longer having great sex. Izzy has his back to him, and it's not as fun as it sounds. They're both looking away from each other, very pensive, very quiet.

The next day, Doug is pretty much going hysterical at the loft. Leo, it's too soon, you got yourself trapped into this, I told you to get out of it, you'll be married before you're ready and become some bland suburbanite with a termite problem. Leo again feels the pressure, and downplays the commitment from last night. No, we just agreed to talk about it, in fact, we're not going to get married.

At the office, Karen and Izzy are discussing things. Isabel hands Karen a sweater, saying, "Oh, I found your sweater at my apartment . . ."

Suzanne and Izzy are having lunch near the office. She's curious and flattered that Doug asked for her number. Will she consider it? A non-commital smile and an Mmmm . . .

Izzy is curious - do quakes make people do funny things? (Like propose marriage when they don't mean to, I'm guessing!) Suzanne is doubtful. So, can Izzy give Doug Suzanne's number? Er . . . can Suzanne have Rhonda's instead? Izzy bugs her eyes out at her friend, smiles, and looks down at her food, trying to swallow the surprise.

So, Rhonda picks up the phone. Rhonda? This is Suzanne. Ah, yes, the seismic woman. There is some awkward conversation about how Izzy and she discussed Rhonda at lunch that day. Izzy mentioned that you wanted to get away from dating a little. Rhonda doesn't like this, she asks, "Is this about a blind date? Because I hate those, I've had bad experiences, I'm sorry but dating someone I haven't met yet - I'm not interested."

Suzanne screws up her courage, and says . . . well, this person I had in mind . . . you've already met her . . . the meaning dawns on Rhonda's face, which begins to smile. Suzanne ventures, "Have you had your place checked for earthquakes yet?", then grimaces at her own awkwardness and hits herself on the forehead.

She comes over to Rhonda's, explains structural things, and shows her where to hide in case of an earthquake - under the table they go. Rhonda wonders if she knows that they terrify people when they talk like this, and are they enjoying it in a sadistic kind of way? Jake comes by, notices them under the table . . . tries not to smile, says, "I've got to, ummm . . . go" and leaves.

Leo comes by Rhonda's job. Rhonda does a weird play-wedding between a swizzle stick and a little figurine, making Leo say the words "I do". Leo confesses that he's there because he wants Rhonda's hard-bitten cynical advice. It's inconceivable to Rhonda that her little brother might be getting married. OK, Leo gets down to brass tacks, he wants to know how he can get out of it without hurting Izzy's feelings.

The big moment. Izzy and Leo are in the kitchen. Izzy starts. She doesn't want Leo to take this the wrong way, it was great what Leo said, but she can't marry him. Why not? It's too early, they're not ready, don't want to ruin it.

Leo the genius practically jumps up and starts prancing around, smiling and thanking the gods. Well, ok, he can't stop smiling and saying, that's great, I agree, we should go out to dinner and celebrate this point on our relationship, etc.

Izzy, with more dignity than I have seen from her so far, angrily but civilly reproaches Leo. "I thought it was a precipituous move, but you look like you have escaped the gas chamber. If at least you had shown a little bit of disappointment . . ." A shot of Leo smiling broadly. "I am disappointed!" She goes into the bathroom, eyes him and says, "I thought you wanted to marry me!" and slams the door.

Next, Doug and Leo, and Rhonda and Izzy, are playing frisbee. Doug is glad about the postponement, but Leo tells him how mad Izzy is. "So, you're screwed, right?" "Yup . . ."

Rhonda asks, "So, Leo weaseled out of it?" "Yup . . ."

Doug asks Leo if they gave Suzanne his number, but Leo gives him the news that she was more interested in Rhonda's number . . .

Rhonda tells Izzy about how Karen came by the loft to drop off Izzy's sweater . . . (Oooooops!) and tells Izzy about this call she got from Suzanne, about how Suzanne started going into her fears of earthquakes, and how this was so totally arrogant.

However, the next scene is of Rhonda at Suzanne's deserted research center, making nice as they walk through the exhibits. Suzanne puts Rhonda into a demonstration chamber, and asks how strong she wants the earthquake? They'll start with a 4.2. Standing outside the chamber, Suzanne pushes the button and the chamber, which looks like a living room, shakes. It's not so bad. How about a big one? Sure, Rhonda says, but get in here, I'm not a crash test dummy. Suzanne sets it to the max, and gets in. The whole world collapses in on them, as they hug for protection. Rhonda is really scared. After it's over, they start to kiss, and make out . . .

Next, we see Karen and Doug parked at the beach next to a pier at night!!! Doug is saying that there are three possible reasons why a woman would ask a man to go for a ride. One, she has heavy packages she wants moved. Two, it's a lady of the evening-type situation, which he's sure is not the case. Three, she wants him to kiss her . . .

She leans over, pretty as ever, she leans all the way over to Doug . . . and they kiss, slowly, enjoying it . . .

In bed at the loft, Izzy tells Leo that she had a weird dream, that she was to bungee jump from the Empire State Building for charity, and that all these camera crews came, but at the last moment she noticed that there was no safety net, that the line was too slender, and she chickened out.

Leo: What I said last night was wrong, but I didn't feel that we were ready, I hope I didn't ruin it.
Izzy: At least the sex was good
Leo: We don't know what's going to happen, right?
Izzy: No, we don't.
Leo: Which is ok . . .

There is a slight tremor, and they laugh.  Then we get a sequence of shots, one fading into the other . . .

A shot of the women in the quake chamber, cuddling. Doug and Karen in the car, kissing. Rhonda and Suzanne, one holding the other with one arm over the shoulders. Doug and Karen laying on the car hood, their backs resting on the windshield, laughing. A close up of Leo and Izzy kissing . . . and the credits . .

1-14 Unbillable Hours--01/18/1997
as we open, we see Izzy popping some of her socks into the microwave. (This actually works, since microwave radiation is a good sterilizer. Sterile doesn't have bacteria, which cause things to smell) Leo, understandably, is a little upset. What is she doing? She knows that he, like, puts food in there? Well, Leo promised to do the wash, but he's been very busy. Leo apologizes, saying that Julia his boss is so demanding. And, Izzy has an assignment of her own, she has to deliver 500 words by the end of the day.

In addition, to make matters busier, Anne (some sort of relative, apparently) is coming that day, and Izzy has to pick her up at the airport. Why does she always get stuck with the grunt errands? She's always the wimp, she should stick up more for herself. Those people at the office, they're such blood-sucking leeches!

This kind of talk gets leo into the mood, a little, and he wonders if she'll talk like that much more, because "it kinda gets me hot". She demurs, saying that she's got to go to the office . . . "you blood-sucking leech . . ." Leo smiles at the playful flirtation, and goes to neck with her. Of course, at that moment, the doorbell rings and Leo goes to see who it is.

The elevator door opens, and it's Jake. Leo was supposed to help him with his Romeo and Juliet school paper, but Leo has been way too busy to help. (This is a nice touch, since the Devon Gummersall's former series-mate on My So-Called Life, Claire Danes, is now starring in the Romeo and Juliet movie.) Rhonda explained the book to Jake, but apparently it wasn't enough. Oh, and Jake needs $100. Why? Leo still considers that a considerable amount, believe it or not. Immediately discouraged, Jake says "Forget it" and tries to walk away. No, really, why does he need it? Jake says that it's for school. OK, Leo says, bring him a receipt and he'll see what it's for, and will write Jake a check. No, it must be in cash. Leo looks askance upon this, and remarks that it's beginning to sound weird. Forget it, Jake says, and the scene is over.

At the office, Dad is breezing through it and Izzy is trailing behind him, trying to get out of picking up Anne. Why not her mom, David asks. Because she's got finals, Jen has darkroom practice, and Karen is . . . Karen. And so, whom to send, whom to send . . . we hear a crash, and the camera catches Jake picking up some drinks (?) that he's spilled.

"Jake?!" David says. No way, after he crashed the Explorer. Izzy shows him a set of keys. "He can take my car". David walks over to Jake, who was eating at his desk, and hurriedly explains that he was lazing around because the server was down. David accepts this immediately, and explains that they'd like him to pick up Anne, and Izzy has been kind enough to lend her car. Anne'll be around for a couple of days, looking at colleges . . . maybe Jake would like to do that, too . . .?

Anyways, she's kind of a quiet sort, withdrawn, maybe Jake shouldn't hurry home with her, maybe take her out for a bite to eat. Jake, still concerned about the $100, asks if well, you know, since he'll be with her, those will be billable hours, right? David is hurt by this, but hides it and says sure, bill for those hours.

At the airport, we see Jake holding a sign, "Anne Price". A pretty but severe-looking young woman comes up to Jake and says "That's me". (Several people on the mailing list have reported this actress as Holly Marie Combs from the excellent series Picket Fences). Jake tries to pick up the luggage, but she firmly declines. "It's on wheels, so . . . "

In the car, driving down the road, all is silent . . . she tries, "So, you're Isabel's boyfriend's brother?" Long pause . . . "Yes . . ." This is not going well. After a long pause, the scene ends.

At the University, they're walking around the halls, and she stops, captivated by the sound of a violinist trying out for the school, the sound is just wonderful. Jake keeps going, notices her, and comes back for her. Her face is so open, staring at that person. Is she OK, Jake asks. Her face turns cold again. "Fine. Just fine". And walks off with Jake in tow.

She calls the Lukenses', but there is no one home. You know, if you aren't doing anything, you could come to my place and chill. Just chill out? Yeah . . .

At the Roths', Bailey and another friend (whom I don't think we've seen before) whisper and giggle about her as she tries to watch TV and not notice. So, is Jake her gigolo? No, he just said that he was getting paid to be with her, every hour with her mean $5.20 to Jake. So, Bailey wants to know, what about the $100? She is Jake's 100 dollars. The guy won't move unless he's got the $100, Bailey reminds Jake.

Tired of the whispering, Anne comes over and the unknown friend offers her a drink, a "mind eraser". Jake self-assuredly tells him, "No, you degenerate, she doesn't do that kind of thing". "What, you think I don't drink?"

"GO, GO, GO, GO", the two friends chant as she chug-a-lugs and Jake looks uncomfortable. They offer her another one, but Jake says that she's got to go back to the Lukenses'. They horse around some more, and Bailey plays the Star-Spangled banner through his nose. She's got to go to the bathroom, and Jake takes her there.

She huddles near the toilet, ready to throw up, and as Jake is about to leave, she explains with distress that that was her audition piece. (The star-spangled banner?, I wondered, stupefied). No, it was the same as what that person she was captivated by at the school was playing. Jake reassures her that so what if it's the same, they need more than one violin player, so she doesn't have to be the best. She responds, gently, that this is naive and wise at the same time. It was really nice of Jake to invite her, he doesn't even know her, and it's good to see someone being just . . . nice. This is bitingly painful (more to me than to Jake, I think), and Jake looks flattered and answers that she's a very nice person.

Overlooking the slough, Jake and Bailey are hanging out. Jake is frustrated with the Romeo and Juliet book. Why couldn't that guy have written it in English? (This was very funny to me). Bailey faultlessly points out that that guy practically invented English. Did Jake get friendly with her last night? He spent 45 minutes with her in the bathroom, and Bailey sensed some sparks between them. No, Jake says, and besides, she's very different from him. She lives in Connecticut, she plays the violin. Bailey calmy says that he wouldn't mix business and pleasure . . .

At the Lukenses, Eve is running around frantic because Anne has been in the bathroom twenty whole minutes! She hopes Anne isn't in there throwing up. David told Jake to bring her right home, right? Er, well, not exactly, but it was definitely implied. (!!!) Eve continues to worry, it's nerves, it's definitely nerves.

Anne finally comes out, and you almost had to laugh since you could tell she had been throwing up, she looked pale and weak and seemed to barely be able to walk straight, yet pulled it off wonderfully. Eve asks if Anne wants some eggs? No, please don't even mention food. Eve will take Anne to the audition that day, but Anne asks, "Why . . . Jake can't take me?" Poor Eve says, well, you know, I thought you might want it to be me. Anne "considerately" responds that Eve should just study for her finals.

At the Roths', Leo stops by. He is welcomed by Rhonda and Hal, and Leo can't seem to get off the question of how Jake seemed last night. He seemed good? He seemed good? (After that nice chat with Anne, he'd better!) Rhonda just gives him this wonderful self-assured questioning look over her cup, while Hal manages to project a great deal of character with just posing the question to Leo, "Why are you asking?"

Leo spills the beans about the $100, and they all immediately assume that he's in some sort of trouble, probably serious, possibly involving drugs. "He's on the stuff!" Hall assures them both. They laugh, but then someone says, "We can't go through his room". Hal says, "We could - with love in our hearts, he will thank us one day". Leo tells everyone to calm down, they will not do that, that would be such an invasion.

At the high school, Jake opens his locker and we seem to be looking out from the locker at Jake. He looks in pensively . . . and closes the door. He approaches another guy and asks, "Joey Russo, right?" Jake needs to buy a term paper. Joey cagily tries to play it like it's a piece of moon rock Jake is asking for, and he'll try to see what he can do. How much is it? "Well," Joey says, "how bad do you need it?"

A counselor shows up right then, and literally corners Jake. Jake's missed the last two counselling sessions with him, and is two weeks late with the paper he owes (presumably the Romeo and Juliet paper). Jake becomes very defensive, and puts off his counselor with agitated excuses and promises.

Cut back to the Roths', where Leo, Rhonda and Hal are ransacking Jake's room. Hal finds some erotica, and approvingly says, "Well, he likes women!" Rhonda interjects, "That makes two of us". (Allright Rhonda! Heh, heh, heh, I wanted to high-five her. Touche'). They find some letters intended for their dad Barry, which speak of Jake's dire academic situation. He will likely not graduate. They are looking at this letter in amazement, in the thrashed room, and we cut to Jake standing at the door. "You went through my stuff!", he accusingly says to them, before trying to leave.

Leo won't let him, confronting him with the letter. What did you need the $100 for? Drugs? Are you in some kind of trouble, we want to help you. Jake just leaves.

At Epicenter, David comes up to Jake and explains that Jake should just bring Anne right home from the audition. Are they clear on that? Yes.

At University, they are both sitting on a bench outside the room where the audition takes place. Anne feels like she's about to nosedive into a concrete pit. A professor comes out, "Ms. Price?" She goes in, and Jake pulls out a notebook . . . and this beautiful melodious violin starts to waft from the audition room. Jake seems drawn to it, and gets up to look in through the window at her. Just when you are falling deeply into its spell, she blows a note, and stops. She recovers, and starts again. A few seconds later, she blows it again and loses confidence, and just leaves the room.

At the Lukenses, Anne blows in through the door, leaving Jake behind. He follows her upstairs, and sits next to her on her bed. Is she allright? How can Jake ask that? Well, Jake says, maybe they didn't notice. She tells him how she played a little violin at the age of 5, and since her mom seemed so nauseatingly supportive of it, Anne never stopped to question it. Anne wishes she had known how her mom had really felt underneath all that supportiveness.

Isn't it ironic, or whatever, Jake points out, how she can do something so beautiful that makes her feels so miserable. Anne tells him that's a very nice thing to say. Well, it's true, Jake replies. In that wonderful way that tells you things are working out between you two, she says that she's gotta get out of there, her mom will be there. Can they get out of there? Jake says sure.

At the Lukenses, Eve and David arrive, carrying groceries. Eve eagerly looks for Anne, calling out "Annie?  Sweetie?"

"Sweetie", however, is at the Natural Sciences museum with Jake, looking at fossilized animal skulls, feline-looking ones. So, your family thinks you're a drug addict? Yup. Are you? No. So, what are you like, then?

Jake then answers the question with the most charming flirting I've seen in a long time. He smiles and says people think I'm quiet, but I'm a primal, wild beast kind of guy. I'm like a wolf. She smiles back, and looks very fetching as she answers that she never considered herself a wolf, always thought of herself as maybe a porcupine. But, hey, maybe she is a wolf, and just didn't know it. Jake's answer is . . . "What a way to make money!" (Yes, I slapped my own forehead, hard).

"What?!" she rightly asks. Are you being paid to be with me? And she walks off. He catches up to her in another exhibit room, and with a guard trying not to listen nearby, Jake says that he's not such a wolf. He's more like an idiot. She says that what Jake said brought back everything that had happened to her during Junior High School, and that this just proved it to her all over again. Jake quietly says that he would never, ever want to prove anything of the sort to her . . . and they kiss! Allllllllright! : )

Leo and Izzy arrive at the Lukenses and join the worried Eve and David. Eve says that Anne is missing, and overrides David's comment that she's not missing, just not home yet. She's with Jake. Eve snootily says that thank god Jake is Jake, otherwise she wouldn't know what to think. Izzy gives Leo a look that says "Sorry" and "What a comment!" at the same time.

AOOOOOOOOOO, a wolf howl, as Jake chases Anne through the darkened park around the museum. Jake catches up to her, and after laughing and kissing, asks "So, aside from the slip-up, you did ok? When would you start?" and these questions seem to make Anne momentarily uncomfortable.

Ding dong! "Thank god!' Eve says, as she dives for the door. But it's not Anne, it's Anne's mother. Well, she says, presenting her to the assembled family, look who's here. The mother's first words are, "So ,where's Anne?"

Back to Jake and Anne at the park. Jake says that they can't hold her back just because of one little slip-up. She can't believe she's meeting him now. That school is her last choice, she wants to go to Yale. It's ironic. Jake wonders why. "Because you're here". And they draw together again, and kiss . . .

"Jake?", Anne's mom wants to know. "Isn't he the one who crashed the Explorer?" Jake and Anne arrive. Jake is back to his laconic self, just saying, "Sorry". Leo reproaches him, saying "Is that all you're going to say to these people?" David tries to intervene, saying maybe we can talk about this tomorrow at the office.

Jake: Give it a rest.
Leo: No, I will not give it a rest. What did you want the 100 dollars for?
Jake: I needed it for the Romeo and Juliet paper.
Leo: I was going to help you with that!
Jake: Yeah, whatever.
Leo: No, don't "Yeah whatever" me!
Jake: I'm stupid, ok, is that what you wanted to hear? I've read the book four times and I still don't know what it's about.

Jake walks out, past all the silent, embarrassed people.

Leo and Izzy arrive at the loft. Leo says that he was like a deer in the headlights, he shouldn't have pressed Jake. But it was Izzy's dad who seemed to be taking over the situation, and where does he get off doing that? Izzy nicely says that her dad was the one trying to let go of the situation, and put it off for tomorrow as a work situation, not as some sort of father.

Leo is deflated. Well, obviously Jake will never speak to him again.  Well, at least he still has a sister. Leo shouldn't have put Jake on trial at Izzy's house, which (no disrespect) but it's intimidating.

At the Roths', Jake is listening to quiet music. Leo pops in, and Jake stays calm. Leo says that he's sorry, Jake asked him for help, but Leo's been too busy. Leo flashes the Cliff's notes for Romeo and Juliet and says maybe they could work on that paper? I was afraid we were going to get more of that patented Jake avoidance thing, but Jake says, "Well, I don't have anything else to do, so..." Leo smiles, sits down, and pulls out Jake's favorite soda. I loved him for this, that was so cool.

Jake says, "That girl was pretty cool". Leo worries for a second, "You didn't . . ." Jake says no, but she's cool, and she's 10 million miles away. Leo looks carfully at Jake. "Are you smiling? Is that you smiling?" Jake smiles more broadly, and just says "Let's get to work". Leo looks appraisingly at Jake. You know, Izzy is supposed to drive her to the airport tomorrow, but if you wanted to, I could arrange it so that . . .

Jake is driving, Anne is in the back, looking alive, and Anne's mom is beside Jake looking very, very, pinched. : )

So, Jake asks Anne in the airport hallway, she hates me, right? No, she doesn't hate him. She hates Leo. She thinks Jake is a poor, lost soul who is good. Jake tells her he finished the stupid paper.

So, if the University makes the mistake of the century and they let her in, she might go there. Jake sweetly and generously says that if she gets into Yale, she should go there. I mean, it's Yale. She appealingly asks him, didn't Romeo and Juliet give up everything to be together? Jake smiles. Yeah, but they died. She smiles back. Which sucks.

So, she wonders, are you billing for this? Jake looks at her sincerely and says that, in careful consideration, he thinks that, retroactively, you know, he really - it isn't really fair for him to bill for any of it . . .

Tears almost spring to her eyes as she beams a smile of pure joy at him, puts her hand to her heart for an answer, turns around, and walks towards her plane . . .